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The bad news is my toddler dumped my husband’s large water bottle all over the couch and himself. The good news is now he’s had his bath— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) November 14, 2021
I told my toddler he was so cute I could just eat him up and now he’s bringing me snacks from the kitchen so I’m not hungry.— kidversations (@kidversations_) November 16, 2021
My kids’ friends’ mom always has some exciting craft for them to do when they go to her house. When my kids’ friends are over, I just sit on the couch and occasionally call out “does anyone want chips?”— SpacedMom (@copymama) November 16, 2021
Half the parenting vocabulary is the word “wow”— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) November 16, 2021
*Googles Thanksgiving recipes*— Jessie (@mommajessiec) November 14, 2021
*Googles easy Thanksgiving recipes*
*Googles really easy Thanksgiving recipes*
*Googles is McDonald’s open on Thanksgiving*
My toddler just slapped me with one glove. She may not know what it means but I’m a woman of honour. We duel at dawn.— Brona C. Titley (@bronactitley) November 13, 2021
My kids were screaming at each other.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 18, 2021
I told them to stop fighting.
They said they weren't fighting. They were playing "Karens."
Now everybody is grounded.
Nobody prepared me for how loudly babies sleep— Erin Ryan (@morninggloria) November 17, 2021
10 said she doesn't like my coffee breath, but she'd rather deal with that than my "decaf personality," I think she's figured out marriage.— AparnaRC (@Wordesse) November 18, 2021
My daughter's eyes were barely open this morning when she said "mommy I want to wear a really pretty outfit today."— Beth Newell (@bethnew) November 16, 2021
“Daddy, are you going to pick me up from Art Club or do I have to ride the bus that smells like bare feet and underwear?” and other ways 11 y/o’s communicate with their parents.— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) November 18, 2021
i feel a little slimmer after a week of eating mostly goldfish crackers, clementines, fig newtons and string cheese…im calling this the toddler diet— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) November 13, 2021
Today I had a significant first-time experience as a parent to young children…— Meena Harris (@meena) November 19, 2021
These kids just pranked me with a whoopee cushion. While I was on a work call.
Me: You can pick between Superman or Spiderman.— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) November 18, 2021
3yo: I pick Batman!
Making a mad dash home to grab my kid’s mask before the bus comes is my gym membership— Melissafent on the Hillifent (@awkwardenabled) November 15, 2021
Our TV remote stopped working and 12 year old just went ahead and replaced the batteries. He didn’t even try giving the old ones a little shake to bring them back to life. Have I taught this boy NOTHING— three time daddy (@threetimedaddy) November 13, 2021
My kids ran out of corks for art projects so I ordered a case of wine, I feel this is my moment to shine— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) November 14, 2021
told my kids to build a fort to get them off their iPads, so now they're in the fort, watching their iPads— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) November 18, 2021