Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways -- so we like to round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy.
Why Does The Couch Smell Like Pee
- a guide to parenting
— Oh Susanna (@Just_Oh_Susanna) October 9, 2014
Back-to-school night last night. Then straight to CVS for some Airborne, Stridex and Wet Wipes.
— Jersey (@ItsMrWoody2U) October 8, 2014
19 years of education. 2 degrees. 39 years old. Yet here I am. Losing an argument with a 3 yr old about wearing his Halloween costume to bed
— Fonzie's Evil Twin (@caperbc75) October 9, 2014
Having kids is the best way to tell the world that you no longer care to be on time.
— Los (@LosLos__) October 8, 2014
My kids are crying for dinner at 4:30.
Weird, I don't remember them turning 80.
— YKIHAYHT (@YKIHAYHT) October 9, 2014
My kid asked me what it was like having children so I just kept requesting pizza and saying I wasn't tired.
Then I passed out on the floor.
— Noir (@Go2Slp) October 8, 2014
Seriously tho... I love my kids, but damn I'm tired.
— Mommalicious (@SouthrnPinUpMom) October 8, 2014
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