The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up their hilarious musings.
Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below, then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.
Every female lead in a scifi movie is like "my hair is short bc it's the future"
— Katie Hannigan (@katiehannigan) January 6, 2022
We don’t give masks enough credit for how much easier they made it to cry in public
— Ginny Hogan_ (@ginnyhogan_) January 2, 2022
Voldemort beefing with a 12 year old is very funny to me
— Kash Sinn (@KvshSinn) January 2, 2022
Whoever this toddler is they must be stopped pic.twitter.com/VWQVQuecKV
— Yell in a War (@jelenawoehr) January 5, 2022
credit card chip machines are like:
— Sarah J. Hass (@tacko_belle) January 2, 2022
- DO NOT remove your card
- DO NOT - hey look at me - DO NOT remove your card
- take out your card immediately or I’m burning this place to the ground
Boneless wings be so good when you don’t have a hater in your ear telling you they’re chicken nuggets
— Alyssa🕊 (@___Alyssah) January 1, 2022
just had the thought “should i give my bf a treat of some sort when he does something nice for me to reinforce that he should keep doing that?” and then i realized that’s dog training
— dana bad (@baddanadanabad) January 4, 2022
if u order takeout and there’s leftovers, that’s actually meal prepping baby! nice work!
— 𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕗𝕝𝕠𝕨𝕖𝕣 (@spinubzilla) January 4, 2022
email was a mistake. we shouldn’t be able to communicate this quickly. if my husband died at Gettysburg, that's not my business until next spring.
— elle you see why (@proofrawk) January 4, 2022
many of my deepest friendships are maintained by a “omgggg” story reply every few months
— Emma Ketchum (@emmaketchup7) January 4, 2022
HGTV couples are always a man being like “I GOTTA have my man cave to relax and unwind” and a woman begging for first floor laundry to make domestic servitude less soul-crushing
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) January 2, 2022
there are SO many men at the gym??? it’s like they haven’t heard that a timothee chalamet pete davidson jack harlow type is in demand now.. y’all go home and get funny
— nesrin danan (@blackprints) January 5, 2022
A friend of mine did social media for Allstate and her job mostly consisted of deleting hundreds of womens’ vile, horny comments about the Mayhem guy.
— Katie Rich (@katiemaryrich) January 3, 2022
ur not "pandemic dating" you're CDCing each other
— i can be your long lost pal (@PallaviGunalan) January 4, 2022
I can’t do this today pic.twitter.com/V24PKiDWy3
— Nori Reed (@realnorireed) January 4, 2022
tomorrow is email's time to shine. the check ins, the just following ups, the circling backs, the bumping ups, the hope your break was great the options are absolutely endless. wishing them luck on their biggest day of the year xoxo
— Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) January 3, 2022
all babies should learn baby sign language so they can start gossiping right away
— jo (@cowboypraxis) January 4, 2022
when the beatles said “he got feet down below his knees” i thought, fuck yes. i have feet down there too
— cass city (@HeavenlyGrandpa) January 1, 2022
The TikTok girlies are saying 2008-2010 twee aesthetic is coming back and I’m fuming! We cannot go back to ballet flats and white tights!
— Camilla Blackett (@camillard) January 2, 2022
Making plans in 2022: I can’t get covid this week, but I could next week?
— Isabel Hagen (@isabelhagen_) January 2, 2022
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