29 Of The Funniest Tweets About Married Life (Aug. 24-Sept. 9)

"Wives only want one thing and it’s for you to open your eyes man because your keys are literally right there in front of your face."

Marriage is full of highs, lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between.

And somehow, the spouses of Twitter continue to find humor in the minutiae of married life and sum it up perfectly in no more than 280 characters.

Every other week, we round up the funniest marriage tweets of the previous two weeks. Read on for 29 new, relatable ones that will have you laughing in agreement.