What is there to really be thankful for? Being alive? Who wants to be alive during Thanksgiving?
Your drunk aunt is ranting about the Obamacare website even though she uses Internet Explorer, and no websites really work on Internet Explorer anyway. Your cousin is stoned and eating the turkey with his bare hands a full hour before it's served. There are children running around, and they smell. You eat until you hate yourself. But there's a way out -- and it's through your beautiful, shiny gadgets.
So here's how to secretly enjoy all your gadgets this Thanksgiving because let's get serious, it's 2013. We should be carving the turkey with a lightsaber at this point.
Scroll down to find out how you can secretly use all your tech during the big day.
THEM AT ALL!
Hey now wait a minute, HuffPost, you said --
Shhh. Yes, we promised a way to use your gadgets during Thanksgiving. But we had to fool you because we wanted you to hear this message. For us at HuffPost, gadgets are like extra limbs. Still, we can live without them for just one day.
What about that game of Candy Crush?
It will still be there the day after.
What if we want to Instagram our beautiful spread?
Last Thanksgiving, more than 10 million Instagrams, shared at a rate of 226 photos per second, flooded the photo sharing services' servers and broke a record. You really want to be a part of that dubious achievement again?
So no watching Netflix?
Come on. You have the rest of your life to sit in the dark and contemplate your life in the 15 seconds between episodes during your binge watching of TV seasons.
Who needs tech when you have THIS anyway?
So please, in a plea for sanity and serenity -- turn 'em off this Thanksgiving.