Yeah, yeah. We know. The basic premise of this piece has been done a million times before. We plead guilty to un-originality.
But in an effort to fit the plot lines of the popular HBO series "Game of Thrones" around the landscape of the 2016 election, we're struck by how closely the main characters of each actually resemble each other, physically and narratively. I mean, just take a look ...
OK, not really.
Donald Trump is Daenerys Targaryen. I mean, the flowing locks.
Errr, OK. Maybe Trump is more like her dragon.
Which would make Tyrion Lannister ... Trump campaign manager Corey Lewandowski.
And Newt Gingrich the Master of Whispers, Varys "the Spider." Those scheming eyes.
RNC Chair Reince Priebus is Jorah Mormont, facing apparent doom and hopelessly seeking the favor of the dragon lady.
Then you flip over to Democratic-run Westeros, where we have the party establishment, accused of iron-fisted rule.
Hillary Clinton is Cersei Lannister.
The other half of the relationship, though ... he seems charming.
And, of course, the muscle behind it all: The Mountain as John Podesta.
All of whom are facing a stubborn insurrectionist with a bunch of faithful and aggressive male followers: Bernie Sanders, otherwise known as the High Sparrow.
Meanwhile, in a completely different branch of government, these two guys are trying not to get killed by members of their own party.
... All the while, inspired by their hero-father figures.
And having to deal with threats of terrorism.
And since we're basically trying to fit a square peg into a round hole at this point, let's just keep going.
There's a fierce warrior making headlines.
And then there's Jeb. Please clap.