Are you living an authentic life true to yourself? Or, are you living a life that has been assigned to you or expected of you? Dr. Phil says many people don’t have what they want in life because they don’t know the questions to ask themselves.
“It’s not that you don’t have the answers to get everything you want in your life, you don’t really even know the questions to ask yourself to determine whether you’re living an authentic life or whether you’re not,” says Dr. Phil, who has partnered with AARP and Life Reimagined to offer an interactive course guiding people to reflect, evaluate their priorities, and take action to live their best lives.
Leslie, who was married for 24 years, lost her husband in a tragic accident seven years ago and says she’s finally ready to start looking for love again -- but now she wonders if her list of dating demands could be sabotaging her search.
“It’s time for me to find somebody to share my life with. I’ve grieved enough and I do want some companionship, but I’m also at an age where I don’t want someone bugging me,” says the mother of three grown sons.
Some of her requirements for a partner include a man who loves his mother, a good driving record and someone who doesn’t sleep naked. “Is that being too picky?” she asks. “I don’t want to compromise. I want to find somebody who gets me.”
Dr. Phil asked Leslie to take The Rut Test, one of the exercises on the Life Reimagined website that helps determine if you’ve stopped taking the kind of actions that create quality results and instead settled into a going-through-the-motions lifestyle, as the first step to analyze her situation.
“You’re in a rut. And that means that you need some direction, you need some guidance,” Dr. Phil tells Leslie, based on the results of her test. “The reason I created The Rut Test is because there’s a difference between living as a prisoner of your past, or a prisoner of expectations of other people, or a prisoner of what you think you’re supposed to do even if it’s from yourself. And I think it’s really important for us to examine whether we’re living our authentic self or we’re living something that we’ve been assigned or what our expectations are. This Rut Test is a great way to get there.”
Dr. Phil suggests that Leslie explore his interactive program on the Life Reimagined website to further evaluate her situation. “You’re going to take a lot of tests, you’re going to do a lot of assessments, I think I’ve got 50 videos in there explaining different things. You’re going to talk about self-concept, private journal, 10 defining moments in your life -- all these things where I give you the questions that will get you to the answers,” he tells her. “I guarantee you, it will be life-changing, and you might pop up out of that rut when you do it.”
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