Last year, I decided to quit my six-figure legal job to become a full-time author. And let me tell you -- that decision was pretty freaking scary.
But after 15 years of climbing to the top, I realized that when I looked down, I just wasn't where I wanted to be.
I knew I had to do something about it -- or be forever stuck in someone else's idea of living.
I was already making a decent income writing fiction, but I was afraid I couldn't sustain a full-time author career without something else to drive me. (I'm an introvert at heart, but I thrive on deep human connection. That's kind of hard to maintain when you're hibernating in a writing den all day, every day.)
I had already owned successful freelance businesses in the past, so I started to explore my options a bit, thinking I could just dip my toes back into the entrepreneurial waters while I continued the 9-5 grind.
But I already knew I was unhappy. Why didn't I just dive in headfirst?
FEAR.
Fear was holding me back. Fear of losing my stable income, fear of inadequacy, fear of what other people would think.
But then the Universe gave me several swift kicks in rapid succession.
KICK # 1: I was catching up on the School of Greatness podcast by Lewis Howes when I heard Lewis was going to be in Austin that night for a book signing. I had been following him for about a year, and was so inspired by his story. I knew I had to meet him.
I stopped what I was doing, bought a ticket and rallied a few girlfriends to go with me.
That night, I asked Lewis what positive qualities he thinks he's absorbed from the five people he spends the most time with, and what positive qualities he thinks he gives back to them in return. He thought about it for a moment, looked me in the eyes, and said:
"Permission. I think I give them permission."
I nodded. He didn't need to say anything else. I knew exactly what he meant.
And in that moment, I knew he was giving me permission, too.
Permission to take a chance.
Permission to let go of things that were no longer serving me.
Permission to leave "normal" behind and chase after the extraordinary life I knew I was meant to live.
Later in the evening, Lewis mentioned that people with successful professional careers often have a hard time leaving the safety and stability of full-time employment to follow their dreams. That statement really hit home. Was I destined to be one of those people who just settled?
KICK #2: The next day, my boss called me in chat. After acknowledging that the firm had seen its best year ever and saying he was "so grateful" for our hard work and dedication, he told me he was taking away 10 (10!) of our existing paid days off.
At first I was mad. I mean, really, really mad. In 15 years of working with lawyers, I don't recall a time I had ever been so angry.
Our team had built a well-oiled machine that made millions every year. The firm ran like clockwork while my boss traveled all over the world. Meanwhile, the rest of us were on call 24/7. And then he "rewarded" our hard work by cutting our vacation time. I felt betrayed.
But, like too many professional women, I didn't speak up. Instead, I held my tongue, walked back to my office and fumed silently. After a while, my anger faded to a simple question:
"Why am I leaving my personal freedom in the hands of someone else?"
KICK #3: Driven by my indignation over my lost vacation time (and a stellar deal on airfare!), I hopped on a 5 a.m. Saturday flight bound for NYC with two of my closest friends. We wandered around Manhattan, talked about our dreams and imagined what our lives would look like if we had pursued our creative passions.
On Sunday, we met another friend for brunch. Emboldened by the city, the company and -- let's be honest -- the cocktails, we spent the afternoon declaring our emotional independence from things and people that were dragging us down.
Less than 24 hours after we arrived in New York, we were on our way back home. I went in search of a change of scenery, and found the inspiration to lead a more authentic life. And I knew I wanted to help others find that inspiration, too.
During the flight back, I shared my revelation with my friends. I told them I wanted to be a business coach for women, to guide them to live their dreams. Even as I spoke the words, fear started to peek back in. But my friends -- my beautiful, supportive friends -- didn't let me give in to that fear. They told me I had the power to encourage, to influence, to energize... and that I had been doing it for years without even realizing it.
They were giving me permission.
I returned home with a renewed sense of purpose, ready to stoke that slow-burning creative fire that I kept hidden deep inside me. I spent the rest of the year finding a place for my dreams to live.
In the early hours of the morning, I poured my energy into writing fiction. In evenings and on weekends, I focused on building my coaching business. And with every step I took, I knew I was one step closer to fulfilling my true purpose.
On January 4, 2016, I quit my job.
I'd like to say it went smoothly, but that's not what happened.
My boss, likely driven by a combination of panic and ego, threw out hurtful insults about my choice, calling my decision to quit "selfish" and "disruptive," and telling others I had been "overpaid for years."
But his opinion didn't matter anymore.
I knew my value. I knew who I wanted to be. I knew what my ideal lifestyle looked like.
And I finally gave MYSELF permission to make it happen.
Now I'm finally living my dream, and it feels absolutely fabulous.
I'm here to help you take that leap, too. I know how it feels to be stuck in someone else's idea of a perfect life.
But the thing is, doing what you want to do and being who you actually are is your RIGHT -- a right as innate as your right to breathe.
If you're not being authentic in your work, then you're not living an authentic life.
Ask yourself:
- In what ways are you settling for less than you deserve?
- Who (or what) is holding you back from pursuing your passions?
- What's the worst thing that could happen if you decided to go for it?
- What's the BEST thing that could happen?
- What's one thing you can do TODAY to start building the life you've always wanted?
Don't let yourself be bogged down by fear, uncertainty or doubt.
Don't stifle yourself with what-ifs.
Shake things up. Give yourself permission. Live your dream.
And say hello to a Shiny New Life.