People love tweeting about many aspects of the holiday season ― from company parties to Secret Santa gift exchanges to classic movies. For families who celebrate Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights offers its own kind of Twitter fodder.
We’ve rounded up 25 funny and relatable tweets about Hanukkah from parents who celebrate the holiday, as well as those simply trying to explain it to their children.
I don’t think the architects of Hanukkah considered the long term psychological effects of giving a toddler a present every night. For eight consecutive nights.— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) December 11, 2018
We’ve got a monster on our hands.
A parent's Hanukkah miracle is having barely enough patience to survive one night of a holiday that involves open flames, yet somehow making it through eight of them.— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) December 7, 2018
Dad, do we celebrate Hanukkah?— Tim (@Playing_Dad) December 3, 2014
"No, honey that's a Jewish holiday."
My friend Jake celebrates it but he's not Jewish, he's a vegetarian.
6yo just decorated a cardboard menorah my mum gave him for Chanukah.— MumInBitsmas (@MumInBits) December 9, 2018
There was glitter.
My mum and I are no longer on speaking terms.
My kids are a quarter Jewish, so they'll only get gifts on two nights of Hanukkah.— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 29, 2017
Kid: grandma and grandpa are coming for Hanukkah and bringing guilt.— Emily Oster (@ProfEmilyOster) December 17, 2019
Me: you mean gelt
Also me: yup.
Nothing and I mean NOTHING prepares you for the day your 10yo tells you he wants a ball warmer for Hanukkah.— Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) December 3, 2019
My son asked for his Hanukkah gifts a week early so he can enjoy them before Armageddon. The nature/nurture argument continues.— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) November 3, 2012
My 9 y/o and 12 y/o are watching Elf while decorating Hanukkah cards for their grandparents. I want to see Will Ferrel play a Macabee in a Jewish remake. 🙏🏿🔥— Bunmi Laditan (@HonestToddler) December 2, 2018
It’s ok for my kid to tell another kid that Santa’s not real when they say Hanukkah is stupid, right?— miriam (@shluffie) December 13, 2019
And on the second night of Hanukkah, I lit the menorah while my non-Jewish kid sang "Happy Birthday" just like my ancestors intended.— Julius Sharpe (@juliussharpe) December 10, 2012
In the time honored tradition of the third night of Hanukkah, our son was left incredibly disappointed.— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) December 6, 2018
For a Hanukkah gift, I'm gonna assemble my son's birthday present from July.— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) December 20, 2014
I guess Jesus was the first kid that got to celebrate Hanukkah and Christmas.— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) December 9, 2011
My next door neighbor growing up had a Catholic dad & a Jewish mom and got gifts for Hanukkah AND Christmas without ever setting foot inside a church or a synagogue. It angers me to this day!— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) December 3, 2018
A conversation between boys who celebrate Chanukah:— Sandy Rustin (@SandyRustin) December 7, 2013
4yo: Is Santa real?
4yo: So, he just walks through the door?
“Imagine an iPhone lasting eight nights on one charge”— Daniel Lin (@danwlin) December 8, 2015
- Me, explaining Hanukkah to my daughter
A lil Hanukkah story: my dad is taking pics of my kids playing dreidel in our haunted museum and there's white blurs over all the photos.— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) December 19, 2014
6: How many days til Chtistmas— The Alex Nevil, Thanksgiver (@TheAlexNevil) November 23, 2015
Me: 32. But remember: you have to behave or Santa doesn't bring presents
6: What if we try Hanukkah?
Last night I gave my kid a Nintendo Switch for Hanukkah so I can play it. Tonight I’m giving my wife a cigar ashtray and my daughter gets a bottle of Maker’s Mark.— (((Josh Malina))) (@JoshMalina) December 14, 2017
Two out of three of my children know we celebrate Hanukkah. Any of you want to break it to the third kid? Reward.— Cuppy (@runawaycupcake) November 3, 2012
Other kids sang "Girl on Fire" as they lit the Chanukah candles tonight, right?— MarinkaNYC (@MarinkaNYC) December 3, 2013