- Dare to not compare. Comparing is the root cause of suffering. Every time you say "I used to..." as in "I used to be thinner, younger, fitter..." you are comparing. Instead look at the current reality and who you are today and either accept or change the situation. Likewise, don't waste time comparing your life to others'. There's nothing to be gained from it.
Every choice in life, whether it is about food, lifestyle or our friendships, is either life enhancing or life diminishing. Look at the situation or person and ask: "Is this diminishing or enhancing?" We've all got some dead wood to prune. Never deny yourself the pleasure of doing something just because you have no one to do it with. Too often we give up enjoyable activities because we don't want to be alone. Do it anyway. The biggest mistake people make is letting their age determine their choices instead of looking at what they want to do and doing it regardless of age. Forget: "I'm too old to do that" or "How can I do that at my age?" You can start a new career, learn to play a musical instrument or write a book at any age. The only thing stopping you is you. How often are you disappointed? Are you too attached to life unfolding in a particular way? Try saying this: "I want such and such... or something better." This way, you are manifesting what you do want, letting it go and then being open to a surprise or something different that is even better than your original desire. Plan a "daily uplift." Do one small thing that inspires you or touches your spirit. For example, a walk in nature, noticing buds on trees, tulip shoots emerging from the ground, the smell of the earth. If you leave a decision for a while -- instead of making it under pressure -- often the situation sorts itself out without intervention. And how you feel about something on day one can be quite different from how you feel on day 10. Sit back, breathe and observe the situation rather than making a quick judgement based on what might be incorrect information. We often hastily send that email, engage in that conversation or make a phone call without sufficient patience or reflection. When we are tense, we unconsciously breath-hold or shallow-breathe. This triggers the sympathetic nervous system and cortisol, the "flight or fight hormone." Slow diaphragmatic breathing activates the healing, restorative parasympathetic nervous system. Moving yourself into a healthy parasympathetic state, and staying there as much of the time as possible, helps heal all health conditions, both physical and emotional ones as well. Seventy percent of how fast we age inside and out is based on our lifestyle choices, 30 percent is genetic. Rather than focusing on our chronological age, instead look at the small everyday lifestyle choices you can make to improve your health span. Put emphasis on HEALTH SPAN rather than LIFE SPAN.Try this mini relaxation exercise: breathe in and say "I am," breathe out and say "At Peace."
For more by Elaine Dembe, click here.
For more on happiness, click here.
Dr. Elaine Dembe, The L.I.F.E. Doctor© 2010
200 St. Clair Ave. W. Suite 308, Toronto ON. M4V 1R2
Tel: 416-960-5353 Fax: 416-960-0193