Hard Feelings With a Side of Blame--An American Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving in the U.S. can be brutal due to of all the unrealistic Norman Rockwellian expectations. Unfortunately, what we imagine as warm and fuzzy, can quickly turn cold and prickly.
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Thanksgiving in the U.S. can be brutal due to of all the unrealistic Norman Rockwellian expectations. Unfortunately, what we imagine as warm and fuzzy, can quickly turn cold and prickly.

Even though everyone at the table is somehow related, dinner etiquette can morph
into a kind of blood sport. Back handed compliments and thinly veiled sarcasm abound and it's just not Thanksgiving unless someone leaves the table in tears.

Add a tons of carbohydrates, lots of judgement, a dash of shame, with a pumpkin pie chaser and voila - Hilarity ensues!

NOT.

When you put together people who only find themselves sitting in the same room once a year, there isn't enough alcohol on the planet to keep you in that loving place.

It can turn into a real numb-fest.

The carbs numb you down.
So do the booze,
The sugar,
The football,
Even the delicious sour cream onion dip.

Yes, you heard me. It all numbs us down, making us compliant enough to smile and remain civil so that everyone lives to see another holiday.

But let's all try to remember, shall we, that almost everyone had the highest of intentions when they pulled up the driveway.

And each year can be a fresh start. We talk all about gratitude that day, but I think it's a good idea to start with acceptance.

When you make acceptance the first course, it helps you to remember that everyone is just doing the best they can and it makes the rest of the day play out differently.

My family is loving, relatively sane, and really quite civil --now.
I think that's because we're all so damn old.

The last time we served crazy for Thanksgiving was during the Reagan
Administration.

Gone are the caustic comments lobbed across the table by our perpetually inebriated uncle that were meant to be funny--but weren't--followed by that long, uncomfortable silence.

Everyone, even Aunt Barb, who's worn a wig for the past twenty-five years has stopped criticizing my hair. I'm fifty freakin' seven Barb! It's gray with some purple fringe--let it go, you can't hurt my feelings anymore!

My dad used to prefer that we get dressed up. You know, jacket and tie, skirt and (gulp) pantyhose were mandatory. Since he's been gone you're lucky if anyone has on anything other than expandable waist sweatpants. It's less about style or comfort, we call that practical.

With the numerous food allergies and special preferences around the table, if it's not Non-GMO, gluten-free, free-range, antibiotic and hormone free, vegetarian or vegan; just be polite and eat what you can, or stick with the crudités.

So...let's all practice forgiveness, humor, acceptance and gratitude; choosing to operate from the heart remembering the true intention of this day. Family.

Take a deep breath, put on your best holiday smile, and listen with loving acceptance as your well-intentioned cousin explains to you all the reasons why Hillary will never be President.

Happy Thanksgiving,

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