Hello, Adele... How Are You?

She got us again. Encapsulating lyrics. Beautiful message. Blah blah blah.

Adele, may I ask a question? Will you ever give us a solution to your break-ups, or do we have to wait until album 27? 32?

I keep hearing a hook, a lead in, but you keep Michael Moore-ing us. (That's a US documentarian that sheds light on American problems, but never suggests a real solution.) Give us the clue on how to solve these woes! How do we get to the bloody point?! Or, is that your running joke; there is no point. We all get to cry to feigned sadness without figuring out that you can never really be happy with a reported (as of now) $55 million?

C'mon Adele. You were supposed to take five years off. Weren't you supposed to leave us alone for a couple more years before manipulating our feelings?

Great! You made another album! Hurray! But, now, we have to deal with it...

Hear we go again, Adele. Like the last time - perhaps a follow-up - we get to see that you haven't let go of that last guy, yet you've been in a relationship since your last album. And a new child as well! Congrats!

So the public gets to sit and cry while you have this magical life that has somewhat been bestowed upon you, while you dance under all our money and tears? (If readers are wondering of Adele's background, she attended an Arts School where she was basically recruited into the recording industry.)

Here is where my main problem lies. Lays? Who knows... There are so many teenagers who believe that they can be Adele. They believe they can be superstars and all they have to do is sing. They can use work in pornography for upward mobility - "Look at Kim Kardashian," I've heard. They can fly to L.A. and it's solved! They can make a YouTube video and suddenly be the king and/or queen of all media. (By the way, Howard Stern still created and holds the title of "King of all Media.")

Let me just say that not everyone - 7+ billion and counting - can be famous, happy all the time, sad all the time or everything in-between.

The point is, there are many people that believe acclaim is coming. That it's inevitable. They believe relationships are futile, iPhone notices are more important that real interaction and The Voice auditions are going to make them famous.

And then we have Adele. We get Adele and her team of organizers to keep us all upset about the past, rather than see what's really going on presently. Adele - I say directly: give us hope and help, or leave us alone.

If you're going to distract us, at least make it joyful.

And just to let you know, Adele, landlines are a cute throwback, but because cell phones aren't regulated, cell phone bills are like 10 times as much as they used to be when landlines where in fashion. Why do you think Apple has more cash on-hand than the US Government?

You can live in your secluded, hillside, rented mansion, but please stop using us - the sad, more-likely emotional, hardworking public - to pay for your social detachment.