Here We Come, 2017: 16 Lessons We All Need To Take From 2016

Here We Come, 2017: 16 Lessons We All Need To Take From 2016
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.
Playbuzz

All sarcastic memes and online jokes aside, 2016 hasn't exactly been the greatest year. Whether you view that as a hyperbolic understatement or a humble euphemism, it seems as though the general demographic has arrived at that consensus. While just like any other year - it has been filled with broken hearts, toxic relationships, stagnant ruts and overall destruction - the last calendar date of the mid-2010s has also brought some originality and authentic advantages that separates itself from the pack: body positivity, health awareness, individual acceptance...and unconditional love. These are just some of the few qualities - good and bad, positive or negative - that 2016 have given us. But with those experiences come growth and change crucial to the happiness in our lives. Through thick or thin, 2016 has admittingly taught us nothing short of an abundance of lessons that we hope to continue abiding by in 2017.

Here are 16 of them...

1. No matter what you do, someone's always going to scrutinize you - for the way you look, the way you talk, the way you act. You can accept it as constructive criticism and move forward, or even take their advice. Or you can just do whatever you want. The ladder option is (almost) always better. Just be you.

2. But, do take accountability for your actions. No one is perfect, and neither are you. Sometimes it's easy to forget that while our feelings are valid, we sabotage our own way by responding. It's a natural human trigger that can be suppressed and then manifest in many different ways. However, there's a fine line between expressing your emotions and knowing that every action doesn't have to have a reaction. This is maturity, but so is knowing you were also wrong. Apologize. Realize your decisions and their effect on others. Own up to your mistakes. Owe it to yourself, to forgive. But also, don't forget to forgive yourself.

3. On the other hand, don't so willingly excuse the behaviour of toxic people in your life. Sure, we all lash out and say things we don't mean. But if their habits become a unbreakable pattern and repeat their presence in any shape or form to disrupt your well-being, then it could become time to show those people the door. Curtailing contact may be the only solution to eliminating that negative energy in your life, especially if you have communicated to them that what they're doing is hurtful, and they continue to do it. Yes, this could be the result of a mental illness, medical condition or any circumstance occurring in their life. But, that doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your own emotional health for it. Also, look at the intentions behind their ways. If someone constantly engages in the same means and they're very aware about how they're harming you or impeding your success, that could mean they don't respect you or your boundaries; to say the very least. Anyone who lies, manipulates, humiliates, etc. is not someone you need in your life; although that could be easier said than done.

4. So, remember to take care of yourself. Again, you might be in a situation where someone else in your life is depending on you. They may be ill, or require financial and other types of assistance; one way or another. This may be out of their control, and this probably isn't their fault. But as much as you want to help them, you also have to remember to help yourself. Because if you're not in the proper psychological state from neglecting to fulfill your own needs, how could you even be prepared to do such for someone else? But, make sure you're not just taking care of yourself to take care of others. You can still love and be a decent person to the people in your life; but you shouldn't have to forget yourself to do that.

5. So, also remember to be kind to yourself. This means actually trying to reinforce these positive affirmations to yourself, bringing what you have in mind and making it reality. In other words, don't be cruel to the one person you have to spend time with for the rest of your life: you. Don't call yourself names, don't tell yourself you're ugly or stupid or any adjective that implies that you're not good enough. It might be difficult to believe, when you're constantly comparing yourself to others; especially when you only see the good parts of their lives on social media. You might believe you're the only one who's single or unemployed. This isn't the case. Don't compete yourself with others, because you don't know what they had to go through to get to where they are today. You don't know what advantages or disadvantages have led them on that specific path in their life. It's all relative, but every person and life is different. Not better or worse; just different. Remember this. We all have struggles. So wear the dress, eat that slice of pizza, post that selfie. Do what makes you feel good.

6. Learn how to say "No". This is something I'm doing (and still working on doing). It can be hard to put your foot down; when someone else's feelings or issues are on the line. But remember that they can always find another way of accomplishing what they need to and eventually need to become independent on their own terms. At one point, they need to take care of their selves; just like you need to take care of YOU.

7. Live your life for YOU. We get it. Things happen. You don't always land your dream job at that one company you wanted to work for, or that guy you like won't always requite that same "love" back. But, that doesn't mean you should stop trying! Find whatever makes you happy, and just do it! Even if it takes time, even if you need to take another job in the meantime or do it on the side. Write that book, plan that round trip to Europe, become a globe trotter and monetize your Instagram into a travel blog. Whatever! Do what you need to do, so you can just...breathe.

8. Know everything in your life happens for a reason. As hard as it is to believe, people like that cheating ex or backstabbing BFF served a beneficial purpose in your life. They came into your life; to teach you a lesson, to make you stronger. Not to punish you, but so you can now read the signs; to protect yourself from those who try to break you. Failing every job interview and then finally secure a position somewhere? Or you don't? Maybe you're meant to start your venture. Think of all the entrepreneurs who flunked relentlessly and then built their own dream of making millions. I can name a few, but the moral of the story is that they discovered their passion - what they loved, what they were good at, what aligned with their values and lifestyle, what made them happy - and they found a way to profit from it. It might take months or years, but all of those incidents will teach you what you DON'T want and lead you to do what you DO.

9. Learn how to ask for help. You want to know you did something for yourself. You'll feel bad, if you impose on others for aid. But, sometimes you need to overcome that fear to learn more and advance yourself even further. Everyone needs help, sometimes. Yes, some people are fortunate and hold some privilege in having a direct connection at a company they want to be employed at; or have family that can help fund their living expenses. Actually, there are many stories out there, and it's hard not to bat an eye when you hear them. But whatever your barriers may be, there's nothing wrong with visiting an agency or even speaking to a professional to guide you emotionally, economically, etc.

10. Don't settle. Yes, we need jobs to pay bills. We may keep certain friends or love interests in our lives, because subconsciously - deep down - we feel lonely and crave their company. But gradually, it'll eat away at our own welfare. Just because certain individuals or opportunities enter our lives doesn't mean they're meant to stay. You'll soon realize what makes you happy and what's right for you, may not be the same for anyone else.

11. Don't be a meanie. Everyone is going through something we don't know about. Stand your ground, but be kind - always.

12. Don't be a cheater. I don't just mean that, in terms of manipulating your way through life. I also mean that, in the romantic sense. All I see now are boyfriends cheating on their girlfriends every weekend, girlfriends cheating on their boyfriends every weekend, boyfriends cheating on their boyfriends, girlfriends cheating on their girlfriends, girlfriends taking back their boyfriends who cheat, girls cheating with their friends' boyfriends, etc. You get the picture. This has become WAY too normal, and it needs to stop. Everyone who's aware of it is responsible, especially the unfaithful partner. Think before temptation.

13. Don't lead someone on. In the age of almost-relationships, it can be difficult to distinguish who's giving you a fair shot and who's just stringing you along to get what they want out of it. If you're the one who's unsure, you might be taking your time; in order to see if they're what you want. But, please don't say things you don't mean. Please don't make them think they're on the "ship" to a relationship with you. Don't make them fall for you. And please, whatever you do, don't go for their friend(s) after!

14. Be healthy. This can mean many different things. But, in the physical sense: aim to sleep 7-8 hours a day, drink lots of water, move (even if it's just taking long walks), eat your fruits and vegetables, visit the doctor regularly. Managing stress is also a factor, since it can inadvertently exacerbate or cause other sicknesses.

15. Work hard, play hard. It's important to do both, but learn how to balance the two. Make time for your exercise, spend time with your family and friends, relax in front of your Netflix, participate in some retail therapy! But, also do what it takes to survive. Work at something: school, jobs, or even both if you can! Just give your 110% in everything you do, and remember that moderation is key.

16. Take lots of pictures. Travel. Visit your family and friends often. Explore, eat, love. Capture the moment. Memories are forever.

Popular in the Community

Close

What's Hot