Dental appointments tend to bring out great fear and anxiety, even for adults. Fortunately, they also provide a real opportunity for humor.
We’ve rounded up 45 hilarious tweets about the many facets of going to the dentist ― from flossing problems to drilling woes to nose hair musings.
I have a dentist appointment first thing tomorrow morning.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 20, 2017
If you need me, I'll be cramming six months worth of flossing into one night.
My dentist told me I need a crown. I was like I KNOW, RIGHT?
— Swishergirl (@Swishergirl24) August 8, 2013
Invention idea: A dentist drill that sounds like a lovely, melodious harp.
— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) January 5, 2017
DENTAL HYGIENIST: your teeth and gums are moments from death. Quit your job so you can floss 16 times an hour. I hate you!
— Luke Mones (@LukeMones) October 23, 2018
DENTIST: looks good!
I don't make dentist appointments, I make nitrous oxide appointments.
— ShotofCherye (@CheryeDavis) February 6, 2014
Every time my dentist is kind enough to tell me I need to floss, I am kind enough to tell him that he needs to trim his nostril hairs.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) August 26, 2014
Dentist: ok open up
— paperwash© (@PaperWash) June 4, 2015
"Well I guess it all started when my dad left..."
Dentist: no I mean-
Assistant: wait bill...let him finish
Going to the dentist is a great way to remind yourself what a coward you are.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) February 14, 2012
I get the same feeling at the dentist that I get when a cop car is behind me; I haven't done anything wrong, but I feel incredibly guilty.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) September 30, 2014
Jaws wide open, gums & teeth exposed, the last thing you want is a good-looking dentist! #iForgotToFloss
— Pattie Mallette (@pattiemallette) June 8, 2013
To sound important, when my dentist books my appointment 6 months away and asks, "Does 10am work?", I say,"Ugh, busy. How about 2?".
— Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) February 28, 2013
When my kids assure me they will clean up their mess, I know how my dentist must feel when I assure him I will floss.
— The ParentNormal (@ParentNormal) June 19, 2017
The day you have a dentist appointment really makes you appreciate all the other days you didn't have a dentist appointment.
— Julius Sharpe (@juliussharpe) October 26, 2015
Dentist numbed my mouth this morning. Turns out I'd rather dribble coffee all over my chest than wait 1 more hour to drink coffee.
— Laurie Kilmartin (@anylaurie16) January 10, 2015
MY DENTIST ASKED HIS ASSISTANT TO SUCTION (THE WATER OUT OF MY MOUTH)BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS TALKING TO ME SO I SUCKED HIS FINGER. IM MORTIFIED
— Sarah Lyons (@sarbeaaaar) January 3, 2017
*tries to quietly unwrap a tootsie roll during a dental cleaning*
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) December 4, 2017
Dentist: (cleaning my teeth) Do you floss every day?
— Carbosly (@Carbosly) July 18, 2018
Me: (gargling on blood) Yes, why?
[dentist chair]
— ann (@omically) February 25, 2015
how's school?
*I start talking, dentist notices his hand isn't in my mouth*
oh sorry
*puts hand in my mouth*
how's school?
my dentist hates when i call him a face gynecologist
— kim new years (@KimmyMonte) August 20, 2018
Dentist: I'm going to take your tooth out
— AnOnion (@onion_an) June 10, 2015
Me: Ok then
[later that evening]
Dentist: Well this is nice
My tooth: I'm having a lovely time
[at dentist]
— Reverend Scott (@Reverend_Scott) July 13, 2015
"Are you remembering to floss?"
Oh ya, Dr, totally.
"...u sure?"
Yup.
"Cuz it looks like-"
I REMEMBER, I JUST DON'T DO IT.
Flossing the day of a dentist appointment feels a lot like cramming for a history test you didn't study for but with more blood.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 31, 2015
I'm glad the Dentist calls me the day before to remind me to cancel my appointment.
— ShotofCherye (@CheryeDavis) January 14, 2014
Dentist: *asks me a complex question about my life*
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 3, 2016
Me: Well-
Dentist: *shoves his hand inside my mouth*
I've never been caught cheating on a test, but I did just run into my dentist at the mall while eating cotton candy.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) December 7, 2017
Dentist: Do you grind your teeth?
— A Very TheAlexNevil Christmas (@TheAlexNevil) October 19, 2017
Me: Yes, I have a child.
Me: what should I do?
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) September 8, 2017
Dentist: stop eating sugar, drinking coffee and wine, cut back on stress..
Me: right but like realistically
[At Dentist]
— ☃️❄️🎄Tim🎄❄️☃️ (@Playing_Dad) October 23, 2017
Dentist: When was the last time you flossed?
Me: When was my last appointment?
Dentist: 8 months ago
Me: 8 months & one day ago
Schedule your dentist appointment early in the month so you can do the hidden picture in the Highlights magazine before some kid ruins it.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) May 4, 2017
My dentist gives you a cookie at the end of each visit. A delicious, sugar-filled, cavity causing cookie. I see how this works now.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) January 19, 2018
Why are dentist offices always playing home improvement shows on their tvs? Do they just want the sound of drills to be filling the air?
— Lili Reinhart (@lilireinhart) December 27, 2017
Someday, I'd like to meet my dentist's kids. My teeth paid for their college. I'm part of the family, really.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) October 12, 2015
dentist: now you're gonna feel a little pinch
— strongest living baby (@hippieswordfish) March 1, 2015
little kid: okay
*dentist pinches him*
dentist: that's for not flossing, you little shit
COP: Know why I pulled you over?
— Floyd (@dafloydsta) November 30, 2016
ME: Because I didn't floss?
DENTIST: *rips off cop mask* I gotcha now, you son of a-
At what point does the dentist stop giving you toothbrushes? Dude, I'm forty. I have one.
— Julius Sharpe (@juliussharpe) June 19, 2013
Turns out my dentist is not giving me a plaque for great teeth after all. He really hurt my fillings.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) April 6, 2017
My dentist sent me a reminder postcard
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) April 12, 2017
And a reminder email
And a reminder text
If he shows up outside my window with a boombox, I'm out
DENTIST: "Now lie back and open your mouth"
— Noodles (@Dawn_M_) April 13, 2015
ME: "Please stop flirting with me."
Eating candy in the dentist's waiting room because I'm a bad ass.
— Stacey (@skittle624) September 27, 2017
"Does anyone know why these two should not be joined in holy matrimony?"
— Floyd (@dafloydsta) November 20, 2015
[dentist yells from back] SHE'S NEVER FLOSSED
Dentist: "It looks like you've ground these two teeth down. Why?"
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) September 2, 2015
Me: "I've had to open thousands of McDonald's ketchup packets this year."
My four year old spends the entire 6 month period between teeth cleanings standing in the dentist's office trying to choose a toothbrush.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) June 8, 2016
[sits in dentist chair]
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) May 31, 2017
Just give me whatever made that kid scream "IS THIS REAL LIFE"
I like to sit in random dentist offices & start sobbing uncontrollably when a kid comes in
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) October 29, 2011
*gives picture of a great white shark to dentist*
— Noodles (@Dawn_M_) June 1, 2015
"Yes I want a smile like that please"
Support HuffPost
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
At HuffPost, we believe that everyone needs high-quality journalism, but we understand that not everyone can afford to pay for expensive news subscriptions. That is why we are committed to providing deeply reported, carefully fact-checked news that is freely accessible to everyone.
Whether you come to HuffPost for updates on the 2024 presidential race, hard-hitting investigations into critical issues facing our country today, or trending stories that make you laugh, we appreciate you. The truth is, news costs money to produce, and we are proud that we have never put our stories behind an expensive paywall.
Would you join us to help keep our stories free for all? Your contribution of as little as $2 will go a long way.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you’ll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Already contributed? Log in to hide these messages.