"Love must be as much a light, as it is a flame."
- Henry David Thoreau
Performing a wedding ceremony is a blessing for me. I love the weddings I officiate, and the couples I meet for them.
First of all, I am romantic. Witnessing two people who love each other, make the commitment to their partnership, touches me. The loving they express re-awakens love in their guests for their own loved ones. A wedding is a great family occasion.
But I am also practical. It takes more than romance to make a good marriage, and even a good wedding. Vows need to reflect your daily priorities and values, how you will use challenges to deepen your love, the strengths and qualities you will express to enrich your partnership.
What can you do to bring lightness into the dark moments that life sometimes presents? Do you have a strategy for challenging episodes? How practically can a blessing of Light make a difference?
A blessing of Light in your wedding ceremony introduces a special quality to the occasion. This blessing is simple and gentle yet powerful. The Light brings the gift of levity and joy to the emotions, wisdom and understanding to the mind.
Here are 5 ways you can bless your marriage with a light touch.
Dear friends of mine have a very challenging family condition. I never hear them bemoaning their lot. They are light-hearted and always find something to laugh about. They are a joy to spend time with.
When you see the funny side in a situation, humour is very healing. Joy turns a seeming tragedy into a story you will laugh about in the future.
Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly.
Keep you eyes focussed on the qualities you love in your loved one. What is special about him or her that most touches you? How does he or she show their love for you? What do you love about your partnership?
In the height of romance, you may put your beloved on a pedestal, a being who can do no wrong. None of us is perfect. One groom recently vowed that although his bride was not "perfect", they had their differences, but he loved her imperfections.
There are no prizes for noticing the negative. Bad news is abundant. Yet there is so much good, especially in you and in your loved one. Celebrate yourselves often.
Acceptance starts the process of resolving issues, and restoring well-being and happiness. Co-operating and communicating with each other to produce a solution leads to greater understanding, bringing with it wisdom.
Keep in mind the Serenity Prayer.
God, grant me the Serenity to
Accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, and
Wisdom to know the difference.
If you are feeling challenged, it is worth asking: what are we to learn here? And how can we love the lesson? How can we love ourselves through the process of learning?
Consider: Everything that comes to you is for you. Lifting above the fog of the unknown possibilities will give you perspective. Be open to see clearly the blessing in every situation.
The spiritual Light will assist you. Ask for it to bless you, bearing in mind the highest good of all concerned.
Drs Ron and Mary Hulnick, highly respected authors and founders of the University of Santa Monica, speak about how they end a day. Each shares 3 things they have appreciated about themselves and the other during the day. It is a great way to fall asleep.
Feelings of gratitude can invoke the lightness of warmth, comfort and a sense of security. An attitude of gratitude is a gift you can give to each other. Appreciation for yourself and your loved one will enrich you with more contentment and peace throughout your marriage.
On the most romantic day of your lives, remember your love is as much the light, in both of you, as it is the flame that brings you together. Your light never goes out.
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