Just think, you have just accomplished a major deal in your business, or acquired a tremendous new partnership that you have been working on for months. Maybe you were contacted by some major media outlets to be interviewed to talk about your business or product or a major conference emailed you to speak at their event that will be attended by thousands of people. Finally ,how about you finally get interviewed by Steve Harvey after years of trying? (just me thinking out loud, LOL).
If you are like most people you are so excited that you want to share your excitement with your ‘peoples’. You excitedly pick up the phone and share the good news expecting to hear them sound just as excited are you are. Instead you hear a second of silence and then “Wow, how did you get that?” or ‘that’s nice’, ‘good for you’ . You can sense that they are not really that excited for you.
Has this ever happened to you? How did you feel? What did you do? I know this has happened to me and it made think about it. I know when people share great news with me I make sure to celebrate them and their accomplishments. The fact that they mentioned it to me lets me know they are happy and why not give them words of encouragement and celebrate their moment. We humans love to have people cheer us on and give positive words of encouragement. That is a great feeling. Mostly everyone can receive praise but surprisingly everyone cannot freely give it to someone else.
Sounds strange right, but many people can only receive it and not give it. So although you may constantly tell them good things and celebrate their accomplishments many people will not reciprocate that for you. When they hear that you have awesome news many people take that as a slight against them. They see it as a failure some how on their part. They see you as doing better than them. Even though none of those statements may be true that is how they feel. As long as you are praising them life is good, but once you share your news the mood changes. That is not a healthy relationship.
So now you have a choice, do you withhold your news, happiness and accomplishments as not to offend them and keep the relationship smooth or do you risk the relationship and its awkwardness by sharing your good news when it arises.
That was a decision I had to make. I would share information and would consistently hear, “Oh wow how did you get that?”, and “Can you put me on?”, “Can you give me her number?” No, congratulations, no celebration. The funny thing is I would freely share any information that has helped me but it is more the spirit behind the person that was not good. So I had to gradually remove myself from unhealthy relationships. Life is to short to spend quality time in unhealthy relationships. I celebrate people hard and I am genuinely happy for others as they move forward in their life because we all know how challenging success can be.
I encourage you to evaluate your relationships this year, be wise in your decision making and most importantly make sure that everyone in the boat is rowing the same way and not drilling holes
To be considered as a gust writer please email PKspitch@gmail.com
@pkkersey
@thatsuitsyou