How to Be Single Through the Holidays Without Losing Your Shit

This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

No matter how much you love the holidays, when you are single there are some just annoying as crap parts to it that it can downright tarnish your jingle bells.

So, I am going to cut through the crap today and talk mindsets and strategies to just get through it. Through the obnoxious relatives, awkward parties and just overall grinchy moments that make the holidays less than stellar when you are single.

It will be one part genius and one part ridiculous. But I may or may not be drinking egg nog... the good kind. With booze.

So here we go... WHEEEEEEEE!

1. How To Get Through Awkward Conversations About Being Single Without Losing Your Shit

I used to have a male cousin that would make a huge spectacle looking for my invisible boyfriend "wondering when he was showing up." Jerk.

I would just smile and grab a brandy slush as big as my head. I love brandy slush.

Over the years though, I got smarter and realized when my relatives were asking about my "status" they would follow my lead. When I would fumble about a break-up or not dating right now, that is when they gave me the pity look.

Screw. the. pity. look.

When I instead started about talking about my adventures and how much fun I had that year that look went from pity to jealousy.

It was all about the effin' attitude!

Last year? They actually pulled me aside after too much wine telling me how lucky I am to be single. Yup. That happened.

So here is my question for you. Are you sitting around waiting for love and feeling sorry for yourself or are you going out, having a kick ass life full of champagne, friends, traveling, occasional making out and fun?

It is your life, Sugarpants. What story are you telling?

2. How to Get Through Holiday Events Without Losing Your Shit

Okay, you are missing the point if you are stressing out over holiday parties, events, etc. This is a great time to stop watching Elf, peel yourself off the couch and get out there!

I honestly think this is a great time to dress up, feel good, grab a partner-in-crime and have just a little too much eggnog. Who knows, there may even be other singles there to have a little mistletoe time.

I realize that feels a little Suzy Sunshine, but let me break this down for you:

There is a good chance maybe you are one of the few singles there... so what? Does that mean you have some wackadoo singles disease? That you are not a good person? That you don't get to be happy and enjoy a holiday party?

Does that also mean that out of the people who have dates, they somehow have a one up on you? Is there a Secret KissyFace Society that you got passed over for because you wore the wrong clothes and your parents are new money?

What the is the big effin' deal?

Here is a little secret... you are worrying about it WAY more than anyone else gives a shit. Seriously.

We go through life. Sometimes we are single, sometimes we are not. It really does not say anything about you... unless you let it.

We need to get out of the mindset that just because you are there alone or with a friend means that you are lesser than or not as happy as others there. Or think that just because someone has a date or a relationship they are instantly better off than you and win! What do they win? Where are these life prizes or trophies? Where can I get one?

And if you are worrying about it... what is that about? That shit is all about you and we need to talk! Like yesterday.

In fact, this year I have created something to make all of this a whole lot better. You're welcome.

The Holiday Scavenger Hunt of Awesomenessstarts Dec. 17 and will help you get off the couch and out and about trying new things, meeting new people and having fun this holiday season. Who doesn't need that?

3. How to Get Through New Years Eve Without Losing Your Shit

I think New Year's is like prom. Over-effin-rated. John Hughes lied to me.

If you think it is going to be a super, amazing, fun night... there is so much pressure and you will be let down.

Key to NYE? Lower your expectations and just have a fun night out. Done and done.

So, to share the not-so-secret to my success NYE (wouldn't it be cool if Michael J. Fox was there?) here is what I have done the last couple of years.

1. Get a group of kick-ass singles together for an amazing meal and drinks (sushi, yum).

2. Over dinner, we shared what are goals and resolutions are for the new year. I even gave them Happiness Jar customized labels last year so they could write down their good days and read over them. That is some of the awesomeness of being friends with a life coach.

3. Head to favorite establishments and have your favorite mixologists (I live in Madison. They are not bartenders) make your favorite drinks.

4. Have that champagne toast ready for midnight with your resolutions on your mind. Knowing that things can look completely different a year from now. I know they do for me.

So... here is the deal.

The next few weeks is all about you and your mindset towards the holidays. Are you having fun, madcap adventures or a lonely pity party for one? You get to decide.

Get your cute butt over to the Holiday Scavenger Hunt of Awesomeness and get on the list! You will not regret it, I promise.