The worst thing you can do when you tell your grown kids about your divorce is to expect them not to feel strong emotions, not to feel grief and pain just as you do. Adult children struggle with divorce the same way young children do. Parents expect them to shrug off their split, as if the breakup of the family should no longer concern their grown kids because pieces of their adult lives are in place. Nothing could be further from the truth. Your kids may try to appear stronger than they are, they may appear as if they know what's best. But they're kids and they want to be able to call their mom or dad when they're hurting. You always want to go home again no matter what.