How to Bring the Vision Back to Your Marriage

Think back to when you first got together with your spouse. You could talk all day about your dreams, goals and desires. Then, you got married and those escapades of the mind went out the window and real life came rushing in. It's time to get back to those days of dreaming. But, not just dreaming -- actually have a vision and plan to support your dream.

My husband and I are slightly obsessed with getting our dream home. It's been so bad that we have been guilty of doing drive-bys of estate homes in fancy neighborhoods and even stopping in to view models of these homes. We actually go in the home and envision our family living there. He'll ask me, "So, would you use this as an office or should this be the kids play area?" We'll discuss what we like and what we don't like about the home. The last visit got so real that my husband asked me in all seriousness if we can just go ahead and buy the home. Lol. While, I tried to let him down easy, I had to let him know that we have other things to attend to prior to getting "THE HOUSE." However, we did discuss how and when we would go forward with buying our dream home.

These types of visions are essential when creating a life with your spouse. It keeps you connected and it gives you something to look forward to and to work for...TOGETHER!

It can also help to get a spouse involved with the finances that otherwise would shy away. That means some relief for the one that is always making the budget and trying to keep the household on track financially. Having joint visions will also ease money discussions and create a stronger bond between you. You'll be surprised at how much of an impact finances have on the quality of a marriage.

What do you and your spouse dream about? What are your goals for the next 90 days? What are your goals for the next year? What are your goals for the next three years?

In his book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill states that the first principle to growing rich is to have DESIRE. What is it that you and your spouse desire?

Our desires are connected to our values. Though your reasoning may be different, you may desire the same things because of your values. My husband and I both value relationships. My husband wants "THE HOUSE" so he can entertain his friends. I want "THE HOUSE" so we can comfortably host our family. Our underlying reasons are different, but our desire is the same and our value is the same.

How do you create and achieve a vision with your spouse?

Napoleon Hill instructs his readers to get a definitive amount of money you desire in your mind, determine what you intend to give to get that money, establish a date when you intend to possess what you desire, create a definite plan for carrying out your desire, write out your vision, and then repeat what you write twice daily.

In simpler terms, the Bible tells us in Habbakuk 2:2 to "...write the vision and make it plain upon tablets..." It then goes on to say, "that he may run that readeth it," meaning you need to WRITE THE VISION, you need to SEE IT, and you need to RUN WITH IT.

Tonight, sit down with your spouse and work through these questions:
  • What is our vision for our marriage?
  • What is our vision for our children?
  • What is our vision for our health?
  • What is our vision for our finances?
  • What is our vision for our spiritual growth?
  • What is our vision for our intellectual growth?

As Napoleon Hill suggests, be as definitive as possible when you and your spouse write your vision statements. When you write your vision, be clear about your plan on how you are going to get there. For example, if your vision for your health is to be in top condition, free from blood pressure and cholesterol issues, your plan may be to prep your meals together weekly and workout together three times a week.

Once you have your definitive vision and plan written, RUN WITH IT. Guess what, it should be fun and easy now that you have your BFF onboard and running the race with you. Here's to happy marriage, happy money, and happy visions fulfilled for your life.