HUFFPOST HILL - Ruling Class Tired Of Getting Shafted By Constitution

Ted Cruz favors gutting the 14th Amendment, because only people from Canada should be granted the privileges of American citizenship. Thousands of beltway professionals could be caught in the Ashley Madison hack, though as David Vitter has shown, all you have to do is not act ashamed or quit your job and everyone will move on. Hillary Clinton's campaign wants donors to pay for catering at fundraisers, which to them must feel like discovering a cash bar -- ugh! -- after sitting through an outdoor wedding ceremony. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Wednesday, August 19th, 2015:

IRAN DEAL HMMM - George Jahn: "Iran, in an unusual arrangement, will be allowed to use its own experts to inspect a site it allegedly used to develop nuclear arms under a secret agreement with the U.N. agency that normally carries out such work, according to a document seen by The Associated Press. The revelation is sure to roil American and Israeli critics of the main Iran deal signed by the U.S., Iran and five world powers in July. Those critics have complained that the deal is built on trust of the Iranians, a claim the U.S. has denied." [AP]

SPEAKER BOEHNER: "Why haven’t these secret side agreements been provided to Congress and the American people for review? Why should Iran be trusted to carry out its own nuclear inspections at a military site it tried to hide from the world?" WHITE HOUSE: "[W]e are confident in the Agency's technical plans for investigating the possible military dimensions of Iran's former program, issues that in some cases date back more than a decade."

@jbendery: Sen. Donnelly backs Iran deal. That makes 24 Senate Dems on board (Obama needs 34).

DONALD TRUMP CORRODING SOCIETY - Sara DiNatale and Sarah Roberts: "Scott J. Leader, 38, and Steve M. Leader, 30, brothers who live at the same address in South Boston, were held without bail after their arraignment in Dorchester Municipal Court on multiple assault charges, indecent exposure, and threatening to commit a crime. In a police report filed in court, officers said that Scott Leader said it was OK to assault the victim because the victim was Hispanic and homeless. 'Scott also stated Donald Trump was right, all these illegals need to be deported,' the report said. 'Scott also said he was arrest[ed] because white people always are and never the minorities.'" [BostonGlobe]

"Trump to O'Reilly: The 14th Amendment is unconstitutional" -- the Politico headline distilling the stupidity of this moment in politics.

@sahilkapur: Cruz: "We should end granting automatic birthright citizenship to the children of those who are here illegally."

BASIC MATH SHOWS DONALD TRUMP IS A LOSER - Mark Blumenthal lifts the combover from the bare scalp that is Trump's political future: "Two new national polls show Donald Trump continuing to lead in the race for the GOP presidential nomination. But a combination of basic arithmetic and Politics 101 helps explain why the real estate mogul remains a long way from the support necessary to secure the 2016 Republican nomination… What if Trump holds his current 25 percent support from Republicans nationwide? That number is obviously enough to put him ahead in a field of 17 Republicans, and it may prove sufficient to win an early state contest should the field remain that large. But it is not nearly enough to secure a presidential nomination. Here, Trump's frontrunner status hits a straightforward barrier: To become the nominee, a candidate must win the support of a majority of delegates to their party's convention. Twenty-five percent won't cut it. To put that number into context, consider what Rick Santorum, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney in 2008; John Edwards in 2004; Bill Bradley and Pat Buchanan in 1996; and Jerry Brown and Paul Tsongas in 1992 have in common: All sought presidential nominations and lost, despite receiving between 18 and 22 percent of the primary votes cast nationwide." [HuffPost]

Conservative wannabe wonks clutch their pearls over Trump giving zero craps about public policy.

HAIRCUTS: Jim Manley, Paige Lavender, Sara Bondioli, Laura Barron-Lopez, Jeffrey Young

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NOTHING LAZIER THAN A TEACHER, AMIRITE? - In a move that surely will propel him to the White House at light speed, Ohio Gov. John Kasich (R) took a swipe at the people who spend more time taking care of America's children than their parents do. Tom LoBianco: "'If I were not president, but if I were King of America, I would abolish all teacher's lounges, where they sit together and worry about 'woe is us,'' Kasich said at a conservative education conference in New Hampshire." [CNN]

Obama's golf buddies today in Martha's Vineyard are Alonzo Mourning, Ray Allen and Cyrus Walker.

MEXICAN GOVERNMENT GETTING THE FEELING TRUMP DOESN'T LIKE MEXICANS - And they're not paying for that wall, either. "'We continue to stand by our position that these comments reflect prejudice, racism or plain ignorance,' Mexico’s foreign ministry said in a statement on Wednesday." [Reuters]

WHOA, SLOW YOUR ROLL, BERNIE - America's awful and wasteful health care system is less awful and wasteful than that fiend Bernie Sanders wants you to believe. In your face, Bernie! D'Angelo Gore: "The U.S. spends more than twice as much per capita as the average amount spent by other developed nations, but it doesn’t spend twice as much as every one of them." [FactCheck.org]

NO NO, I'M SUPPOSED TO BE LOSING. DON'T YOU GET IT? Marco Rubio has a cunning plan. Eli Stokols: "While he is indulging the media’s insatiable appetite for photo-ops and laughing off his own pratfalls, Rubio and his campaign evince a quiet confidence, a deeper awareness that none of it matters -- not the corn kernel poll at the fair or the more methodical surveys showing him stuck in the mid-single digits everywhere." [Politico]

CHAKA FATTAH WRONG ABOUT DESEAN JACKSON, AND MIGHT BE CORRUPT - No, congressman, the Eagles released wide receiver DeSean Jackson last year, then the Washington Football Team signed him as a free agent. Also, Fattah, a Philadelphia Democrat, pleaded not guilty to racketeering charges Tuesday. Jeremy Roebuck: "He brushed off questions on his way into court, telling reporters, 'I'm hoping the Eagles have a great season. And I'm concerned about that trade of DeSean Jackson.' (Jackson was traded to the Washington Redskins after the end of the 2013 football season.)" [Philadelphia Inquirer]

RIP LOUIS STOKES - The 15-term House member and Army veteran was the first African American from Ohio to serve in Congress. "He was one of the Cold War-era chairmen of the House Intelligence Committee, headed the Congressional Black Caucus and was the first black on the House Appropriations Committee -- a powerful panel that decides how much each authorized federal project actually gets to spend." [Associated Press]

DICKS TO BE DENIED RIGHT TO ACT LIKE DICKS TOWARD GAY PEOPLE - Courts generally don't like it when you try to ignore them because their rulings hurt your feelie weelies. Lila Shapiro: "Must Christian wedding vendors, photographers, bakers, florists and county clerks offer their services to same-sex couples in spite of their religious objections? So far, the courts appear unconflicted on this issue. Last week, conservative Christians suffered two more defeats in a nearly unbroken string of legal losses over the last decade." [HuffPost]

Marco Rubio's campaign has designed the perfect uniform to wear when pegging children in the head with footballs.

IT SAYS HERE JOHN KASICH MIGHT NOT GET ELECTED PRESIDENT - The Ohio governor is discovering Iowa Republicans get twitchy when you suggest maybe -- just maybe! -- the government isn't always a monstrous behemoth, or that not all brown people are scary. Rebecca Berg: "But the Hawkeye State is not friendly turf for Kasich. In New Hampshire, which tends to favor independent-minded Republicans, he has found a receptive audience for his more moderate stances on expanding Medicaid in Ohio, for example, or on hot-button issues like immigration reform." [RealClearPolitics]

HILLARY OPTS FOR INTRIGUING STRATEGY OF NOT CATERING TO THE WORST INSTINCTS OF SCARED WHITE PEOPLE - Bill Clinton loved signing laws ("decisions were made") that kept minor criminal behind bars for eleventy-twelve years, but Hillary Clinton's not so sure. Samantha Lachman: "'Decisions were made in the '80s and '90s to deal with what was at that time a very high crime rate that was particularly affecting poor people, people of color in the cities,' Clinton said. 'I think that a lot was done that went further than it needed to go and so now we are facing problems with mass incarceration.'" [HuffPost]

TODAY IN 'RICH PEOPLE EXPECTING NOT TO PAY FOR THINGS' - Billionaire donors should provide all-you-can-eat buffets and open bars to millionaires, like Vegas in the old days, Hillary Clinton's campaign (more or less) told the FEC. Eric Lichtblau: "Saddled with hundreds of thousands of dollars in catering bills, Hillary Rodham Clinton’s campaign wants to have donors foot the bill for those appetizers and gin-and-tonics -- not to mention valet parking -- at some fund-raisers." [New York Times]

I ALSO CAN SHOUT OFFENSIVE THINGS, SCOTT WALKER ASSURES DONORS - No word yet whether Walker has started asking people to call him "The Scott." Jenna Johnson and Sean Sullivan: "In a conference call, one-on-one conversations and at a Tuesday lunch, the Wisconsin governor and favorite of anti-union conservatives told backers that his campaign is shifting to a more aggressive posture and will seek to tap into the anti-establishment fervor fueling the rise of Donald Trump and other outsider candidates." [WaPo]

Donald Trump confirms that he's a huge jerk.

THERE IS NO IMAGINABLE DOWNSIDE TO THIS. NONE. Pumping tons of American death machines into the Middle East has never backfired, ever. Akbar Shahid Ahmed and Jessica Shulberg: "As the Obama administration doles out weapons and money to fend off one extremist threat in Lebanon, it's risking that U.S. equipment might end up supporting another group that's no friend to America: the Shiite paramilitary organization Hezbollah -- a key ally of Iran, backer of Syrian President Bashar Assad, and unrelenting foe of U.S. ally Israel." [HuffPost]

This week in HuffPost Hill's THE HAIR PRIMARY - Serial plagiarist and Republican presidential candidate Rand Paul cuts his own hair, which somehow seems consistent with his libertarian ethos. Elle magazine called Rand's self-styling "neat" and "impressive" and said his curls have "great definition." Paul might be losing bad in the polls, but he's kinda winning in… The Hair Primary!

JOHN BOEHNER GOES FISHING - And the fishing boat guy is named Brad Laabs, and guess what? He BLAABS: "'He talked about how he grew up with a really humble beginning with a large family and that his dad owned a bar,' said Laabs, who says a tiny bit of political talk popped up when Boehner mentioned U.S. Rep. Collin Peterson, who lives in the area. Although Boehner is a republican and Peterson is a democrat, Laabs says Boehner spoke highly of Peterson. 'He said they had served on the ag committee together and were in public service together for many years and that they have great respect for each other,' said Laabs, who really wanted to know what he thought about Donald Trump. And while the subject did come up, Laabs says he isn’t at liberty to repeat Boehner’s thoughts on that." You're still a blabber -- thanks, Brad! [DL-Online.com]

BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - Check out sad Billy Corgan at Disneyland.

WHY WOULDN'T YOU USE YOUR GMAIL IF YOU WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT? Serious question for Ashley Madison customers. Cory Bennett: "Thousands of clients using the affair-oriented Ashley Madison website listed email addresses registered to the White House, top federal agencies and military branches, a data dump by hackers revealed. The detailed data, released Tuesday, will likely put Washington, D.C., on edge. The nation’s capital reportedly has the highest rate of membership for the site of any city." [The Hill]

COMFORT FOOD by @dmoralesgomez & @yujia_pan

This cat gives a dog a massage - YouTube

The folks at Bad Lip Reading take on the GOP debate - WaPo

Sheep answer questions in unison - YouTube


@jaredpolis: just to be clear, I am not #JaredFogle and I prefer Chipotle

@elisefoley: “People think Trump is really nativist and bad. Should we use this somehow?” “Let’s say we agree with him and are nativist too.” “Perfect!”

@zachbraff: I don't know who Ashley Madison is, but I'm tired of hearing about her massive dump.

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