POLITICS

HUFFPOST HILL - Trump Delivers Sweatysburg Address

Jeb Bush told Stephen Colbert that the exclamation point after his name on campaign signs "connotes excitement," but we must warn you against driving or operating heavy machinery after watching the clip. The House GOP has some cockamamie plan to get out of its doomed Iran vote, another agonizing step along a journey that usually ends with Speaker Boehner in tears. And Sarah Palin said President Obama "hasn't called off the dogs" that protest police brutality, because there's nothing at all incendiary about referencing attack dogs when discussing civil rights protests. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Wednesday, September 9th, 2015:

HOUSE HAVING IRAN VOTE MELTDOWN - Get it??? Jessica Schulberg and Jen Bendery: "The hard-line conservatives of the congressional Freedom Caucus are stalling a House vote on the Iran nuclear deal, which had been expected on Friday. They're hanging their defiance on a resolution from Rep. Peter Roskam (R-Ill.). Roskam said Tuesday that he would try to force a vote on a resolution that essentially claims Congress' 60 allotted days for reviewing the deal haven't even started. Under legislation passed in the spring, Congress has two months to review, and ultimately cast a vote on, the complete nuclear agreement reached in July between Iran, the U.S. and five other world powers. Most people think the review period ends next week.... On Wednesday afternoon, House lawmakers were scheduled to cast a procedural vote on a rule to begin the process of debating the Iran resolution. At the last minute, House leadership pulled the measure, apparently because they didn't have the votes to pass it with Roskam and the Freedom Caucus opposed. 'You know what? That's cute. That's cuuute, as we say in Texas,' [Nancy] Pelosi told reporters Wednesday after hearing that Republicans were arguing the review period hasn't begun yet." [HuffPost]

SENATE NOT GOING ALONG: - "Senate Foreign Relations Chairman Bob Corker (R-Tenn.), who also opposes the nuclear deal and favors a majority vote, was hesitant to side with Roskam on whether the 60-day review has begun. 'I think the best way to express your displeasure with not getting all the documents is to vote against the deal itself, not to raise some other issues,' he told reporters on Tuesday." [HuffPost]

Jake Sherman has some details about what the House GOP's cooking up in the basement right now.

TRUMP, CRUZ HOLD BRAND-BUILDING RALLY AT CAPITOL - Dana Bash, Eugene Scott and Jeremy Diamond: "Presidential hopefuls Donald Trump and Ted Cruz took to the steps of Capitol Hill on Wednesday, each using their trademark fiery rhetoric to slam President Barack Obama's proposed Iran nuclear deal. Taking the podium with R.E.M.'s 'The End of the World' blaring, the real estate mogul used a brief speech to say that if elected, four Americans being held in Iran will return to the U.S. before he takes office. 'I've never seen something so incompetently negotiated -- and I mean never,' Trump said...Trump said Cruz was one of the first to support him when he shared some of his immigration policies. 'I like him. He likes me. He's backed me 100%,' he said." [CNN]

Jim Gilmore was there, too.

IRAN SHOFAR - Sam Stein and Amanda Terkel interviewed Gilbert Vincent, who blew the shofar at the start of the event. He explained that it was real ram's horn straight from Israel. "If it brought down the walls of Jericho," he said, "I'm hoping the Senate will hear it too."

SARAH PALIN HMMM - "Oh and you know, since your president won’t say it, since he still hasn’t called off the dogs, we’ll say it. Police officers and first responders all across this great land, we got your back! We salute you!" [RawStory]

'Gohmert Vows To Quit Congress And Await 'Nuclear Holocaust' If Iran Deal Passes' [TPM]

It was so hot out today:

But today might be the last 90 degree day of the year!

DELANEY DOWNER - Fourteen percent of U.S. households lacked access to enough good food at some point last year, according to the latest annual food insecurity estimate from the federal government. The change from last year's 14.3 percent is too small to count as statistically significant, but the decline from 14.9 percent in 2011 is good news, say researchers at the U.S. Department of Agriculture. Still, despite an improving economy, the rate is much higher than the 11.1 percent seen in 2007, before the onset of the Great Recession. "It's just appalling that in this country -- when at least from a GDP point of view we have a larger economy than we did before the recession -- we have millions more people struggling with hunger," James Weill, president of the Food Research & Action Center, an anti-hunger advocacy group, said in an interview. Rep. Mike Conaway (R-Texas), chairman of the House committee that oversees the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, the nation's largest antihunger initiative, lamented the new number. "I'm disappointed by the findings in today’s report which revealed essentially no progress has been made in decreasing food insecurity for American families over the past year," Conaway said in a prepared statement. [HuffPost]

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COMMENCE OPERATION: SPONTANEITY - Hillary Clinton can be seen dancing alongside noted famous people Ellen DeGeneres, Amy Schumer and Pink on tomorrow's episode of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show." Dancing! Yes, this is real, and there are pictures out already. "During her interview, Hillary got Ellen's stamp of approval to be the next President. Ellen said, 'You are the smartest and most qualified person for the job.'" [Extra]

OH, TIME TO MOVE ON THEN - House Democrats have looked everywhere and can't find any evidence that Planned Parenthood did anything wrong, which surely will relieve House Republicans, who'd been planning to spend a lot of time and money investigating them and maybe even shutting down the government to defund them. Laura Bassett: "Just before the Judiciary Committee hearing on Wednesday, the ranking Democrats on the Energy and Commerce Committee announced that their investigation has found 'no evidence' to support the claims that Planned Parenthood is engaged in any illegal activities." [HuffPost]

The official group photo of the 114th Congress is out, but it's technically incomplete because it doesn't include lawmakers who are vampires.

Ben Carson is tired of not yelling about Trump, plans to do that instead of not doing it.

WALKER ALSO WON'T COMMIT TO WHETHER A HOT DOG IS A SANDWICH - Cripes, what's with all the questions, you guys, Scott Walker says (basically). Jason Linkins: "You can basically see the Walker campaign as one long attempt to workshop the perfect, Zen-like utterance that not only confers on Walker the ability to avoid questions but subtly impugns the questioner for having the gall to inquire in the first place." [HuffPost]

SHEP SMITH GONNA SHEP SMITH - Fox News' resident guy-who-occasionally-says-non-Fox-News-y things has done that again, this time by SLAMMING Kim Davis and her fellow marriage-equality sore losers. Alex Griswold: "In the end, he concluded, 'Haters are going to hate. We thought what this woman wanted was an accommodation, which they’ve granted her, something that worked for everybody. But it’s not what they want.'" [Mediaite]

More Americans #StandWithShep than #StandWithKim, according to a new poll.

BUSH TAX CUTS PART II: THE RE-CUTTENING - Hold onto your butts: A Bush boy wants to severely cut taxes for rich people! Zach Carter: "Republican presidential hopeful Jeb Bush outlined a tax plan on Wednesday that broadly resembles the tax platform presented in 2000 by his brother George W. Bush. The main difference: Jeb would give even bigger tax breaks to the the ultra-wealthy." [HuffPost]

[Jeb! was on Stephen Colbert's first "The Late Show" last night.

JOHN KERRY HAS HEARD ABOUT THOSE HUDDLED MASSES - The United States will do more for the people fleeing war in Syria, the secretary of state says. Elise Foley: "The U.S. set a ceiling of 70,000 refugees total for the current fiscal year, which ends on Sept. 30. But groups devoted to resettling refugees have long said that number should be far higher, and are now calling for the U.S. to take in 100,000 Syrians next fiscal year, along with 100,000 people from other countries. Germany expects to take in 800,000 refugees this year. By contrast, the U.S. has accepted only 1,500 Syrians since the beginning of the war in 2011." [HuffPost]

OUR CONSULTANTS SAY THE MILLENNIALS LOVE THE MOBILE VIDEO YASSSS - It's like HBO Go, except it's only one show, and it's about terrible people. Judah Robinson: "CNN has announced that it will stream its upcoming Republican debate on Sept. 16 for free, meaning no cable account authentication will be required to view the debate online or via its mobile app." [HuffPost]

Elizabeth II has been England's monarch for a record 63 years as of today. More importantly, the United States hasn't had a monarch for 239 years.

FAMOUSLY HAWKISH DEMOCRAT HAS HAWKISH FOREIGN POLICY IDEAS - Hillary Clinton, who backed the Iraq war, would start one in Iran (or wherever) if she had to, the presidential candidate said today. Jessica Schulberg: "While the speech focused on Iran, Clinton also addressed foreign policy elsewhere, highlighting areas in which she thought Obama was too hesitant to use military might to exert American influence abroad." [HuffPost]

CHAKA FATTAH WOULD LIKE SOME OF YOUR MONEY, PLEASE - The House Democrat from Pennsylvania is up on corruption charges and he wants someone else to pay his lawyers. John Bresnahan: "On a new website, Fattah said his defense fund 'will ensure that I have the best people and resources necessary to defend my name and my good works in Congress on behalf of the citizens of the Second Congressional District.'" [Politico]

BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - Apparently there's a creature called salmon and it's basically perfect.

GOSH, I SAID I WAS SORRY, OKAY GEEZ - Hillary Clinton totally feels bad now about her weird email stuff and totally would never do it again and totally wants to talk about something else now. Maggie Haberman: "Asked by Mr. Muir about a recent poll in which respondents used words like 'liar' and 'untrustworthy' to describe her, Mrs. Clinton conceded that she still had work to do: 'Obviously, David, I don’t like hearing that,' she said. 'I am confident by the end of this campaign, people will know they can trust me, and that I will be on their side and I will fight for them and their families. But I do think I could have and should have done a better job answering questions earlier. I really didn’t, perhaps, appreciate the need to do that.'" [NYT]

COMFORT FOOD

- Mexico's soccer team uses Donald Trump to get its fans pumped for an upcoming game against the U.S.

- Here is a pug wearing pink sunglasses and a hoodie, and playing drums along with "Enter Sandman."

- Ooh, cool new space photos!

- Horse says hay bae, brings hay to his horse girlfriend.

TWITTERAMA

@rebleber: We're going back to using a stylus and keyboard at #AppleEvent and have a Clinton and Bush running for office. It's the circle of life.

@andyjayhawk: I'm sure my wife would love to use Apple TV to shop if I allowed her access to electronics.

@mattyglesias: You know what’s a really fascinating and under-explored aspect of Hillary’s tenure at the State Department? Email server management.

@TheWetHorse: I'm a wet horse. Nay.

@EvanMcSan: just think about how much candy you can crush with 5.6m pixels folks

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