POLITICS

HUFFPOST HILL - Scrub Time Begins As Arne Duncan Heads To Sideline

Democrats renewed their calls for gun control after yesterday's mass shooting, apparently forgetting that gun ownership is enshrined in our infallible Constitution that we have never changed before for any reason. The Labor Department put out a disappointing jobs report, the numbers severely affected by Scott Walker campaign laying off the 700,000 people it had hired. And Jason Chaffetz announced he's running for speaker, apparently hoping everyone was impressed by how many times he interrupted Cecile Richards. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Friday, October 2nd, 2015:

'STUFF HAPPENS,' SOME GUY SAYS - Katherine Krueger: "Former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush reportedly told a South Carolina crowd on Friday that gun control is not the answer to reducing gun deaths in the U.S. because 'stuff happens.' The remark, reported by The New Yorker's Ryan Lizza, came amid renewed calls for greater restrictions on guns in the wake of a massacre at an Oregon community college that left 10 dead, including the gunman. The remark was similar to Republican frontrunner Donald Trump's response to the tragedy, who said 'these things happen' when asked how to prevent future mass shootings." [TPM]

Obama's reaction to Jeb: "I don't think I have to react to that." He then reacted for about five minutes, elaborating on the unhelpfulness of guns.

ALL THE SHOOTER'S GUNS WERE LEGAL - Dana Liebelson: "Firearms used on Thursday in a mass shooting at a small community college in Oregon were purchased legally, authorities said on Friday. Some weapons may have been purchased by family members." [HuffPost]

OBAMA NOT INTO A SUPER SHUTDOWN - "Super shutdown" is our suggestion for a more helpful term than "debt ceiling," which the president talked about after a reporter asked if John Boehner's resignation makes things more difficult: "It will complicate the negotiations, but when it comes to the debt ceiling, we're not going back there. Maybe it's been a while so let me just refresh everybody's memory. Raising the debt ceiling does not authorize us to spend more. It simply authorizes us to pay the bills that we have already incurred. It is the way for the united states to maintain its good credit rating. The full faith and credit of the united states. Historically, we do not mess with it. If it gets messed with, it would have profound implications for the global economy and could put our financial system in the kind of tailspin that we saw back in 2007-2008."

IS AMERICA READY FOR A PLACEKICKER AS SPEAKER? - Jason Chaffetz holds the Brigham Young University record for most extra points kicked in a single game (10!), but many Americans remain deeply prejudiced against football kickers, for obvious reasons. Rachael Bade and John Bresnahan: "The last-minute move by the fourth-term lawmaker underscores frustration among some members of the Republican Conference with the current choices to lead the conference after Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) leaves at the end of the month." [Politico]

SAD OBAMA LEFT TO SHOOT HOOPS ALONE FROM NOW ON - Dave Boyer: "Education Secretary Arne Duncan, one of President Obama’s longest-serving Cabinet members, announced his resignation Friday as the president praised his service. 'America’s going to be better off for what he’s done,' Mr. Obama said at the White House. 'It’s a record that I truly believe no other Education secretary can match. I couldn’t be prouder of him.'" [Washington Times]

Here are some photos of Obama and Duncan bein' buds.

Learn a little about John King, who Obama wants to replace Duncan as Education secretary, but knows in his heart can't replace him as BFF. :'(

RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU THINK ANYTHING WILL BE DIFFERENT THIS TIME - Didn't think so. Tessa Berenson: "Connecticut Senators Richard Blumenthal and Chris Murphy announced new legislation Friday morning in Hartford, Connecticut that would bar gun sales until background checks are complete." [Time]

Joe Manchin not even bothering anymore.

Reminder that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is not even allowed to conduct research on the public health effects of widespread gun ownership, because we already know that bullets are good for you.

DELANEY DOWNER - Jason Lange: "U.S. employers slammed the brakes on hiring over the last two months and wages fell in September, raising new doubts the economy is strong enough for the Federal Reserve to raise interest rates by the end of this year. Payrolls outside of farming rose by 142,000 last month and August figures were revised sharply lower to show only 136,000 jobs added in August, the Labor Department said on Friday. That marked the smallest two-month gain in employment in over a year and could fuel fears that the China-led global economic slowdown is sapping America's strength." [Reuters]

DOUBLE DOWNER - That thing when a reporter asks someone if they witnessed a specific school shooting and they didn't, but they DID witness a DIFFERENT school shooting, because school shootings sure happen a lot.

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JOE BIDEN MAY BE RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT - Or he may not be. We'll all find out eventually, so chill. Paul Kane and Dan Balz: "Biden seems poised to continue his deliberations for several more weeks -- and possibly into early November -- leaving precious little time to launch a bid and get on the ballot in key early primary states. Prominent donors are being courted, and senior strategists with ties to President Obama’s past campaigns are in conversation with Biden’s team." [WashPost]

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS TRUMP STORY - JK, yes you will, because it's about him being crappy to brown people. Elise Foley: "Republican candidate Donald Trump told the U.S. Hispanic Chamber of Commerce on Friday that he will no longer attend an event scheduled for next week, because his advisers worried he would be pressed on his deportation plans and get questions from reporters, chamber spokesman Ammar Campa-Najjar said." [HuffPost]

REID RIBBLE WOULD LIKE DEMS TO CAVE ON ABORTION PLS - Rep. Reid Ribble thinks there's a way for Republicans to defund Planned Parenthood without shutting down the government. "I don't think that's the correct strategy to get to what I think is a win, and that is not having taxpayer dollars going to Planned Parenthood," the Wisconsin Republican told HuffPost's "So That Happened" podcast. "What is it that Democrats really want that they might want more than they want this?" he said, referring to federal support for Planned Parenthood. "You're looking at a $3.8 trillion budget, maybe there's something else they might prefer to have." Sounds crazy until you remember "John, I will give you D.C. abortion." [HuffPost]

The Center for Law and Social Policy has suggested some ways TANF could help babies have better lives.

WHY ELIZABETH WARREN FRIGHTENS WASHINGTON - Zach Carter explains: "The American political elite have never really been riled up over Elizabeth Warren's policy positions. They're just frightened by the culture war she's waging against the soft corruption of Beltway careerism. Sure, Warren is tough on Wall Street. But such left-wing radicals as Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) and former Citigroup CEO Sandy Weill support reinstating Glass-Steagall and its restrictions on risky securities trading.... Her campaign against Wall Street tax-inversion guru Antonio Weiss? 'Political grandstanding' and 'fratricide' from a know-nothing eager for a "scapegoat," they say. Her letter highlighting corporate conflicts of interest in the research of (now former) Brookings Institution scholar Robert Litan? That's 'bullying' and 'McCarthyism,' a 'crusade' born of a 'power rush,' they claim. 'I got the death penalty,' Litan told Politico -- an impressive metaphysical feat, if true." [HuffPost]

Obama is going to see a play next month for a fundraiser, and nothing bad ever happens to presidents at theaters.

JOHN KASICH SAID...SOMETHING ABOUT CLIMATE CHANGE. WE THINK? - Here, you read this and see if you can make any sense out of it. Kate Sheppard: "'Well, again, I don’t know that's scientifically proven that it's because we have emissions and that's what's happening,' Kasich said, before trailing off. 'Let me just stay there before I wade into another controversial area. Uh, but let me just say to you that I think there are things we can do to protect the environment. We should. But we shouldn't worship the environment.'" [HuffPost]

THE VOTERS RAND, THEY RAND SO FAR AWA-AY - Dr. Paul the Younger isn't doing so hot at this whole running-for-president thing. Chris Cillizza: "Add it all up, and you see why he is where he is, which is nowhere. Stranger things have happened in politics than a Rand Paul comeback. But with pressure likely to ramp up on him to return home and make sure the party doesn't lose his Senate seat next November, it may become increasingly hard for Paul to hold on to his presidential dreams." [WashPost]

Of course Donald Trump tried to bribe a reporter.

HAWKISH HILLARY CLINTON IS HAWKISH - Clinton wants to more aggressive with Syria than Obama seems to. Anne Gearan: "'I personally would be advocating now for a no-fly zone and humanitarian corridors to try to stop the carnage on the ground and from the air,' the Democratic presidential hopeful said in an interview Thursday." [WashPost]

IMAGINE WHAT IT MUST BE LIKE TO HAVE TRUMP FOR A BOSS - Here are some people who won't have to! Maggie Haberman: "Donald J. Trump’s advisers have hired new aides in Virginia, Texas and Florida, three states beyond where the early votes are cast, as they try to demonstrate that the real estate mogul will remain in the race for the duration. Karen Giorno will be the campaign’s state director in Florida, while Corbin Casteel will play that role in Texas. Mike Rubino will be the state director in Virginia." [NYT]

AWW - @RepRichHudson: Renee and I wanted to share our joyous news! We are pleased to introduce you to Richard Lane Hudson III.

WHAT IS WITH THE SECRET SERVICE? - I mean. Carol D. Leonnig and Jerry Markon: "The director of the Secret Service knew that unflattering, private information about a congressman was circulating among agency staff members before it was leaked to the news media, contrary to an earlier statement made to federal investigators, according to two government officials briefed on the investigation." [WashPost]

Proving no one is too loathsome for K Street, the price-gouging pharma bro has hired some lobbyists who will patiently explain to Congress that price gouging is awesome.

GET READY TO BE ELECTRIFIED, VIRGINIA VOTERS! - The most dynamic man in politics wants to be your governor. The question is: Can you handle this much heat? Laura Vozzella: "Former White House adviser and Republican U.S. Senate nominee Ed Gillespie confirmed Friday that he plans to run to become the governor of Virginia in 2017." [WashPost]

MAYBE DON'T SHACKLE EIGHT-YEAR-OLDS, DOJ BRAVELY SUGGESTS - This is a thing now, too! Ryan J. Reilly: "The Justice Department on Friday got involved with a federal lawsuit against a Kentucky school resource officer who was seen keeping a third-grader with ADHD in handcuffs in a video that went viral this summer." [HuffPost]

BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - Snopes has investigated the rumor that Barack Obama is a gay Muslim.

COMFORT FOOD

- The guy who wrote "Moving Like Bernie" has a new song specifically about Bernie Sanders.

- Ten sexy Scarlett Johansson photos to distract you from America's gun problem.

TWITTERAMA

@jbendery: "You're lucky enough now to have to sit through a little bit of a press conference with me." -- Obama to Arne Duncan's family at the WH

@NickBaumann: I have a new people-rating app called talking shit behind your back.

@jmhattem arne duncan is good at basketball we should call him arne dunkin'

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