HUFFPOST HILL - Paul Ryan Wants To Spend Time With Widow's Peak, Kids

Republicans appear no closer to choosing a new speaker, meaning we’re probably a few days out from members nervously putting their index fingers on their noses. A reporter mistakenly asked the wrong House member if she had an affair with Kevin McCarthy, though given that this is Congress we’re talking about, she might still hold a press conference asking her spouse and constituents for forgiveness. That said, we also mustn’t forget the real victims in all of this: Kevin McCarthy’s interns, who now must scramble to find a new way to get laid without the Speaker’s Balcony. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Friday, October 9th, 2015:

STILL NO SPEAKER, CALLS FOR PAUL RYAN GROW - How about this: Kevin McCarthy reenters the speaker's race and, to placate the Freedom Caucus, a group of nonunion moving crews relocate the Hall of Presidents from Disney World to the well of the House chamber, which can be activated by a button on Tim Huelskamp's keychain every time the group thinks the chamber needs to be reminded of... erm... freedom. Animatronic Thomas Jefferson can serve as chief deputy whip. Mike McAuliff and Jen Bendery: "-House Republicans finally agree on something: how desperately they want Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) to be the next speaker. It was all they could talk about after a GOP conference meeting on Friday morning. 'I would love to see Paul Ryan run,' said Republican Conference Chairwoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers (Wash.). 'Yes. I want Paul Ryan,' said Rep. Hal Rogers (R-Ky.), chairman of the House Appropriations Committee. 'I think he can unify the conference.' 'Definitely my No. 1 pick,' said Rep. Peter King (R-N.Y.). 'He's considered very smart. Very hard-working. Very honest. He ran for vice president of the United States. So people who attack him, it would look as if they just won't accept anyone. 'Even one other speaker candidate, Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah) and one potential candidate, Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.), said they'd prefer Ryan. 'I'm going to keep working on Paul Ryan,' Issa said. 'I would not run against Paul Ryan,' Chaffetz said." [HuffPost]

Wait, Jason Chaffetz is running?

Nice guy: "One reason that he has frequently cited: his kids. Ryan has three young children and goes back to his hometown of Janesville, Wisconsin, every weekend to spend time with his family. Even as rumors swirled on Thursday night that Ryan was reconsidering, his colleagues said a major hurdle was strains that the notoriously rigorous job would place on Ryan's family. 'He’s got small kids. He’s a family guy. He goes home every weekend. And that job is really, really tough and very demanding,' Rep. Trey Gowdy (R-S.C.) said." [HuffPost's Marina Fang]

Rep. Mike Thompson (D-Calif.) joined the HuffPost Politics podcast, told us about seeing Kevin McCarthy at the gym on Wednesday.

Remind us never to try to make any member of the Freedom Caucus eat broccoli. Jesus. "While top House Republicans are trying to push a reluctant Ryan into the job, on the grounds that he alone can unify the conference, conservative lawmakers gave a decidedly cool response Friday when asked if they want him to be their new leader...Huelskamp also criticized one of Ryan’s major legislative achievements in Congress, the two-year budget agreement he hammered out with Sen. Patty Murray (D-Wash.) in 2013... 'A lot of folks want to break that up already,' Huelskamp said. House Freedom Caucus Chairman Jim Jordan (R-Ohio) declined to weigh in on Ryan as Speaker, noting only that his group had earlier backed Rep. Daniel Webster (R-Fla.) for the job. And Rep. John Fleming (R-La.) dismissed the idea of a Ryan groundswell." [ The Hill's Peter Schroeder]

HPH endorsement: Grumpy Dave Obey for interim House Speaker.

Haircuts: Michael Whitney (h/t Michael Whitney), Julia Rosen (h/t Julia Rosen)

HUFFPOST HILL IS AT POLITICON IN LOS ANGELES - If you happen to be at Politicon and you see Arthur Delaney and mention this item AND you recently got a haircut, he will buy you a beer. On Saturday he will be moderating a money & politics panel with Clay Aiken, Bill Burton and Dennis Kucinich. [POLITICON]

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ELLMERS RESPONDS TO AFFAIR RUMORS - Congress simply isn't interesting enough for this kind of story to be true. Jake Sherman, Anna Palmer and Lauren French: "Rep. Renee Ellmers stood up in a private meeting of Republican lawmakers on Friday and thanked them for their 'prayers and support' after they received “nasty emails” accusing her of having an extramarital affair with House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy, according to multiple sources in the room. She did not mention McCarthy (R-Calif.) by name, detail the content of the emails or provide any other information. Sources close to Ellmers and McCarthy say the accusation is unfounded, and assert that it is being spread by a discredited troublemaker. McCarthy has publicly denied that any personal problems were behind his stunning decision to withdraw from the speaker's race on Thursday. 'As someone who has been targeted by completely false accusations and innuendo, I have been moved by the outpouring of support and prayers from my colleagues, constituents and friends,' Ellmers said in a statement. 'Now I will be praying for those who find it acceptable to bear false witness.'" [Politico]

A reporter asked Rep. Ann Wagner (R-Mo.) about her relationship with McCarthy. Wrong congresswoman..

CLINTON MEETS WITH BLACK LIVES MATTER ACTIVISTS - Dana Liebelson and Ryan Reilly: "Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton met with Black Lives Matter advocates on Friday in Washington, D.C., to discuss racial justice and law enforcement reform. Attendees said Clinton talked more frankly about racism and the long legacy of slavery than she does in public, and they characterized the meeting as tough and productive...linton met with a number of activists, including DeRay Mckesson, Brittany Packnett, Johnetta Elzie and Samuel Sinyangwe, all of whom are on the Campaign Zero planning team and are affiliated with the group We the Protesters. Those present from the Clinton camp were national political director Amanda Renteria, senior policy adviser Maya Harris and African-American outreach director LaDavia Drane, attendees said. 'In the end, I felt heard,' Mckesson said. 'It was a tough conversation, and we didn’t agree about every approach or everything. But she was willing to be pushed, and it was a candid conversation, and that’s important.'" [HuffPost]

Bo Obama turned seven today, which is 49 in dog years. Being a 49-year-old male, he promptly switched his party affiliation.

BEN CARSON DEMANDS MUSLIMS GO BACK FROM WHERE THEY CAME , HOCKS LOOGIE INTO SPITTOON - Asked about his belief that a Muslims shouldn't be president at a National Press Club event, he replied with a rambling answer about the Founding Fathers and the Constitution's clause that presidents be natural born citizens. "They said we don't want to take even the slightest chance that we would put someone in that position who had different loyalties. That's the answer to your question." But there are lots of Muslims who were born in this country! Or maybe he was just talking about Secret Canadian Ted Cruz? Whatever the case, this is probably a better way to raise money from small dollar GOP donors than vague promises about solving gridlock and fixing the tax code. [@BenjySarlin]

Carson also elaborated on his comparison of gun control to the Holocaust: "Basically what I said is that when tyranny occurs, traditionally around the world they try to disarm the people first and that's exactly what happened in Germany. In the mid-to-late 30s they started a program of disarming the people and by the mid-40s look what happened. And it's happened in a number of countries as well." There you have it, folks. Guns = no Holocaust. [@BenjySarlin]

BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - Here is a dog doing a great Chewbacca impression.


-The rat pizza struggle is real in New York. Behold two rats fighting over the same slice of 'za .

- An oral history of Nickelodeon's "Double Dare."

- Don't be fooled by other urinal simulators. This is the only urinal simulator you'll ever need.


@ericawerner: Rep Kevin Cramer: "I have been considering starting a bloc of 40 members that would be willing to be members of the Normal Caucus."

@pourmecoffee: House GOP Brainstorming Session

"Okay, no bad ideas. All ideas go on the board."

"A robot?"

"Good. Put it on the board."

"Anyone else?"

KRUSCHEV: Comrade Stalin, the fascist advance continues
STALIN: what are we doing wrong?
KRUSCHEV: perhaps we should get guns
STALIN: yes...

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