Do you have to be cordial to your ex?
Is refraining from pouring a bowl of Hungarian goulash over his head considered cordial? Is keeping a few inches over arms length away from him at all times considered cordial? Is keeping conversations to a minimum because "if you don't have anything nice to say..." considered cordial? Then yes, be cordial.
I'm not a fan of being "friends" after I've had a sexual relationship with someone. Why?
It's insulting. When someone I've been sexually involved with wants to maintain a nonsexual relationship, it's like saying, "Hey, I know we had a relationship that included us having sex but now I'd like to stop the sexual part. I like EVERYTHING else about our relationship, ya know? I just don't want to do it with you anymore. Cool?"
So yeah, acquaintance level interactions, yes. I will acknowledge that I know you and you are still in existence despite your lack of importance in my world but I don't want to hear about what you did last weekend. Or even see you laugh, for that matter. There should be no fun in a Kendra-less world.
Honestly, if I could never, ever, ever see any male that I have had sex with again, if I could get them all quarantined to an Island somewhere, Kendra Island that would be ideal. Every once in a while I would be forced to visit to keep me grounded and remind me I do make mistakes. A lot of mistakes.
When I see an ex, I feel like its life's way of saying "Hey Kendra, feeling good? You worked out today, you ate healthy, did some writing, affirmations, all in all a pretty good day? Well, do you remember this guy? Yeah you do. He's emotionally limited and brazenly ignorant. He's pretty much a bullshit artist and a phony. YOU liked him! Remember? Not only that you... well you know what you did. OK, he's gonna come talk to you now, so you can recall his idiotic ways. You have poor character judgement, is all I'm saying. You're sexually attracted to men with no substance or communication skills. Soooooooooooo, you still got work to do, kid! Those jeans do look good on you, I'll give you that! Oh here he is. Smile!"
Thanks for listening!
Kendra is a stand up comic living in Brooklyn where she owns a super comfortable bed. She spends most of her time wondering where the hell her sugar daddy is and hoping he didn't settle.