A few days ago, a piece I wrote three months ago out of anger due to a situation I was hating went out of point because of my grammar mistakes. There were also assumptions made out of things that were never mentioned.
I am writing this not because I feel I need to apologize, just because the main reason why I wrote that went missing. These were the assumptions made and the things I was actually looking forward with my article:
1. The title: I am conscious it was a controversial title. I tried to made a reflection on why I was going through that situation. I came up with two conclusions: I am a plus size and that “I am too smart for them”. In any moment I established that I actually wanted to date married men or that I enjoyed the situation. It doesn’t even establish that I went into the relationships knowing this. All the times I got to know I was involved with a married men I was already into these men, and that was what I wanted to point out.
2. Wives confronting me: Twice in my life I got to know that I was dating married men thanks to their wives, which I did not know they existed previous to that moment. I do look at guys hands but, how are we supposed to know they are married upfront if they do not have a ring? They acted like any single man who has obligations but have the time to be with someone.
3. Marrying with the wrong person: As you guys might have noticed, English is not my first language. Is pretty common in the Latino culture for people to marry very early. If you ask me, that is the reason why they end up cheating. I tried to establish that I am not “too fit to be seen with” or “too smart to handle”, so, these reasons have led me to have a really hard time on the dating scene. I have known many men and women who regret their marriages because they did it too early. I truly believe that this is one of the reasons why at that point, they really don’t care to date that girl with whom they did not wanted to be seen with before.
4. I wanted people to realize that they should feel amazed by their partners: If you read carefully (beyond the grammar mistakes) you might see that I am telling men not to marry women to break their hearts afterwards. So far, no one who have reached me through Twitter point that out. Instead, they are telling me that I am responsible for breaking a girl’s (who I didn’t know about her existence) heart.
5. That piece was written out of anger: I established that being in that situation was something I did not felt proud about, but considering the “look at your couple feeling amazed” part I could see where it was coming from. I do not like dating married men, I actually wanted to get rid of all these stories and it was the reason why I submitted a piece written out of anger and frustration.
This also taught me that, when I write out of frustration, I can get my points totally missing and that I need to proofread because while I was trying to establish that husbands are not perfect creatures and that us, women who have been involved in this sort of situation without knowing, are not necessarily whores, I just earned everyone’s hate.
I prefer you to hate me because in fact, my grammar in the last piece was awful and not because the whole point I was trying to establish was completely missed.
I DO NOT want to date married men, regardless they want to date me or not.