Throughout the months of September and October, HuffPost Teen is highlighting the way teens think and feel about sex through anecdotes written for our series, "Teen Sex: It's Complicated." All of the authors are teenagers who have agreed to be published anonymously. If you want to share your thoughts, join the conversation here.
By "Brittany," 17, Ohio
To me, the word "sex" means... perfection. I lost my virginity in a truck when I was 17 to a guy who, at the time, was not yet my boyfriend. I know what you’re thinking: This sounds like it was horrible. It wasn’t. I am by no means telling you to all go out and lose it in a truck. But when something is supposed to happen, it will.
For me, it just felt right. He had a condom, but he wasn’t planning on sex. I knew he had it. It wasn’t his idea, either. We had been dating for a while. I knew he wanted it, but he was more than willing to wait until I was ready. I don’t know what it was that night, but I just knew. We were making out and I told him I was ready. He made sure I was actually ready and made me feel safe. Everything about it felt so perfect. I didn’t doubt my decision for a second, and to this day, I feel as though it was the right decision.
Five months later and I am completely in love with him, and he loves me. I’m not going to be that girl that says she’s going to marry her high school boyfriend, but if that’s what’s supposed to happen, I have no complaints. We still have sex, but it's not as often because we don’t see each other. He left for college, so it’s pretty much a long-distance relationship. We may have done things backwards, sex and then love, but at the end of the day, we do love each other for who we are.
Together, we’re perfect and no one else can change that. Sex strengthens our loving relationship because it connects us.
Some people may think that I’m an irresponsible teenager for having had sex early. I’m valedictorian, captain of the debate team and an active member of my church’s youth group. In my spare time, I don’t drink or party. I’ve never done drugs, and you can count the number of guys I’ve kissed on one hand. I wasn’t kissed until I was 16.
As you can imagine, the thought of sex terrified me, I never thought it would happen for me. I had no idea what to do or what to expect. I was lucky, though. For me, it just happened, and the fear wasn’t even there when the time came. My boyfriend was the more athletic type, but he graduated with honors and is going to one of the best colleges in the country for his major.
At the end of the day, you are the only one who can know if sex is right. One thing should be true, though: It should feel perfect. You should never feel pressured, or like you have to. You should always feel safe, and it should make you happy. Sometimes, I feel as though I am the only one of my friends who doesn’t regret having sex. Sex should be beautiful and perfect. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. One day, you will find that one person who makes sex what it truly is… perfection.
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- "The Act Of Sex Scares Me"
- "I Slept Around Because Sex Didn't Feel Like A Big Deal"
- "Being A Virgin Sucks, But I'm Still Waiting"
- "There's No One I Can Talk To About Sex"
- "In Eighth Grade, I Signed A Celibacy Contract"