Guys, I want to use the potty alone. How many times have I uttered those words in the past few years? Maybe the past few days would be easier to count. I say that a lot anymore. The situation goes something like this every day: I tell my son 'keep an eye on your sister for a minute please?' I start for the stairs. My son asks "Are you going to the girls room?" I say something like 'Yes honey, I have to potty.' He says "Are you going to the girls room to poop?" I beg ' Please, just watch your sister for 35 seconds. I will be right back."
I charge for the stairs, running up them like a fire is chasing me. I take them 2 at a time, finally, bladder near bursting I am near the door.... I hear little feet hitting the stairs faster than my mad dash. Before the door can close, there he is. I say something like 'honey, please go watch sissy?!' He says "She's right there!" He points around the corner, she laughs, I sigh. 'Guys, I want to use the potty alone...' Both kids are laughing, thrilled with this game of racing and meeting up in the bathroom. Roo declares 'This isn't a potty, it's home plate.'
I agree 'Yep, this is home plate! Now run on to first base!' I am dancing the pee dance at this point. As I finally can begin to pee, it feels so good. Better than sex pee, the plight of the woman who cannot ever enter her own bathroom. My daughter laughs as she tosses shampoo and the like in the bath tub. She jumps on the scale. She dances. Before I can finish my son and the dog burst in. The boy is laughing, the dog looks dejected, I hear my husband on the stairs... He says "I heard you and the baby are pooping..."
Oh my God. People leave me alone... I wash my hands and look at my husband. I mumble something about privacy, needs to use that room just once alone. What if I did have to have a bowel movement? Why is everyone talking about it? Later in the day, all over again. I tell my son, “I want to go alone.” He says “But why Mom?” Like I just stomped on his heart.... his big blue eyes essentially kick me in the stomach. I want to say a number of things like I like using the potty alone. I don’t like the dog in there and you always bring him in. I don’t want you bringing the little one into the mix... But I don’t. I instead inquire why he would want to come. He says “I like being with you!” Those words moved me. They moved my heart, they moved my feet up the stairs and they moved me to allow this little boy the chance to pester me. I was a captive audience after all. Later that evening, as he is getting ready for bed, my son tells me “Close my door and sleep right here Mom!” Pointing to one side of his bed. I see how close to nodding off he is, so I snuggle him close to me. He sighs a dreamy sigh. As he drifts off to sleep he holds my hand. I think about how many times I have muttered about some alone time lately. I think about how many times I have been grumpy over using the restroom alone. I promise myself to stop and savor this season when I am in such high demand, because someday, my son will run in horror at the thought of us both being in the bathroom together. He will be frustrated when I want to hang out in his room. This gave me insight on how to react to my children. While I think time alone is healthy for parents, I think that time spent cherishing the moments is far more healthy. I don’t want to be that mom that looks back in 20 years on fond memories of using the potty alone. I would rather have the memory of a 5 year old boy with his eyes shining, so blue they are mesmerizing, who follows me to the girls room every time I go, just to talk to me.