It was summer 2010, and the end of my lease was quickly approaching for the college apartment I had been living in for a year. We had to be completely moved out by Friday, but I had to be in the next state over, in Iowa, for a conference as a part of an internship by the Wednesday prior.
Despite my many attempts to find a new apartment to live in for the next chapter of my life, I wasn't able to find one that was available at the right time. I managed to get a new apartment lined up, but the problem was that it wouldn't be available for move-in until another two weeks.
This meant I had two weeks of, essentially, no place to live.
The weekend before my lease was up, family came by and took some of my bigger essentials for the time being -- my recliner, bed, dressers, and so on to put into storage for a while. However, I still had many other essentials that I needed for another few days before it was time for me to head out, which included many kitchen belongings to cook and eat, along with bath stuff. You know, the "little stuff."
So on the day before I had to be completely moved out of my apartment I started picking up all the "little stuff" into my car. Clothes. Towels. Kitchenware. Soaps. Extra food and drinks. All piled into my car to the maximum capacity that my car could hold.
And once I had it all packed up, I started driving to Iowa for the conference for a few days. The next two weeks involved driving around the Midwest and meeting with friends old and new.
You'd think that maybe I'd feel stressed or overwhelmed knowing I didn't have a place to live, but, instead, I felt liberated, powerful, and free. In that moment I had let go of the need to have "security" in my life and, instead decided to live in the moment. I felt like the world was at my fingertips and I could go wherever I wanted to and be whoever I wanted to be.
It was that experience that allowed me to realize that the world is not in control of my life -- I am in control of my life. Not apartment leases. Not university requirements. Not the boyfriend, family or whoever. Just me.
At that time in my life it was time for me to be looking for jobs and to start settling down, but during my two weeks of being homeless I realized that it wasn't the right time for me. It was not time for me to get a regular 40-hour a week salary job with benefits. It was not time for me to get married, buy a house, or have 2.5 kids.
I was meant to do more than that.
In fact, we are all mean to do more than just simply that.
It can be easy to get caught up in what society expects of us: the job, the relationship, the house. We check the boxes off the list thinking that maybe if we do all these things that we're expected to do, then it's going to make us happy. It's going to give us security and, therefore, make us joyful by keeping society and others happy.
But the problem is that it doesn't work that way. We can't just plan on pleasing everyone else and expect to be happy, fulfilled, energized, and joyful.
Why? Because it's not realistic.
When we're so focused on pleasing others in hopes to avoid being criticized or rejected, that's when we ignore ourselves -- and the most important relationship that we have in this world is the one that we have with ourselves.
By ignoring and repressing our feelings, intuition, and inner guidance, we become drained. That's when we get stressed out and overwhelmed. We can then feel disconnected and as if we've "lost" ourselves.
But the fortunate thing is that we don't have to live this way.
We can change. We can become better. We can step into our power and fully and completely shine -- we just have to be willing to do the work.
This is where I am so incredibly excited to introduce to you my brand new 5-week course, Your Power: How to Harness Your Energy So You Can Fully Shine. The course will help you transform you from the inside out so that you can create a solid foundation for you to fully step into your true power. Click here to learn more.
Jennifer is a self-love coach, writer, spiritual mentor and teacher. She is the founder of JenniferTwardowski.com and the creator of Your Power: How to Harness Your Energy So You Can Truly Shine and Ignite Love from Within: Meditations to Create Relationships and a Life Filled with Love, click here for a free meditation from the album. Her mission is to help women create more loving relationships with themselves. Click here for her Free Self and Relationship Healing Meditation and weekly blog updates. To learn about how you can work with her, click here.
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