I Would Do Hillary: A Campaign Pledge

Okay. Now there's more 2008 presidential exploratory committees than American who feel the President is doing a good job. The major focus centers on Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton, with the schoolgirl screams inundating the Obama campaign. At best, Senator Clinton receives humiliating bitch slaps covering everything from her political body of work to her body itself.


While the personal and political sticks and stones will continue to be thrown at Hillary, it's about time that someone speaks up for Hillary in the most fervent terms. And if no one else will say it, than I will.

I would definitely do Hillary.

Not metaphorically.

The whole nine yards.

Not just vote for her, but more importantly for my own libido, not throw her out of bed...be it that she would let me in there and Bill were out of town.

Despite what her antagonists would have you believe, I find Hillary not only extremely bright and politically powerful, but also physically attractive. Cute, actually.

I'm not saying Barack isn't hot too. I realize there are planty on the Left who want to crawl into bed with Obama or even Kucinich. But given the choice, the country doesn't need a McGreevey scenario at the federal level.

This is not liquor talking. Liquor hasn't spoken from my lips nor stimulated any other parts of my body for nearly 20 years. This comes purely from a sober turn-on that the New York senator conjures up for me. And having her win elections despite while Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh attempts to demonize her every chance they get makes her makes even more appealing. More appealing than a pitcher of Southern Comfort Manhattans would.

That some might say Hillary's website announcement had too much of a soft camera lens quality suppressing the traces of aging makes no never mind. Barbara Walters uses that technique all the time and I would do her too.

And it wouldn't be one of those "wham, bam, thank you for letting me vote for you, ma'am" things. How fascinating would dinner over politics and gossip be with the most powerful woman in the world not named Oprah. 'Course, I would let the Senator pick up the check. I'm easy, but I cost a lot.

Cute. Powerful. Bugs the hell out of the Right Wing noise machine. What more could I want? But if I needed any more carnal encouragement from the New York legislator - and for those who had a problem with Hillary's aggressiveness during Bill's presidency - would it have been that her fight for a health plan not have been so cynically dismissed by her foes. She wasn't as wrong then as she was far ahead of her time.

Universal health care a turn on?

Ever had your Cobra run out?

So while some might laugh or question my endorsement, remember what George Bush has done to us for six years. And he didn't even take us to dinner.

Steve Young is the author of "Great Failures of the Extremely Successful" and his column appears in the LA Daily News Sunday Opinion page...to the left of O'Reilly's...really.