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The hardest part of breaking up...can be the breakup itself. If you shy from confrontation, if you're bad with words, if you're unsure of your ability to effectively cut someone off, or if you're just plain scared of your partner, iDump4U may be the passive-aggressive (and affordable) alternative you're looking for.
What is it: iDump4U is, simply, a third-party service that dumps your partner in your stead.
"We provide breakups for people who can't handle the breaking up," founder Bradley Laborman told The Huffington Post. "It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it."
How it works: Customers interested in the service must provide personal information such as first and last name, email address, telephone number and the name and phone number of the "dumpee." The dumper should also explain why they need iDump4U's help.
To verify that the dumper and the dumpee are in a relationship or have had personal contact with one another, Laborman requires that customers temporarily friend him on Facebook. Laborman then looks for interactions via wall posts, photos of the two parties together, and more.
If Laborman finds evidence of a relationship on Facebook, he calls the dumpee and explains the reasons behind the breakup. Some calls are recorded and posted to the iDump4U YouTube channel. Laborman stresses that his audio clips never contain last names and that the dumpees' voices are intentionally distorted.
iDump4U offers different breakups for different prices. While a standard breakup costs $10 via PayPal, ending an engagement will set you back $25. Initiating a divorce is a $50 commitment, but Laborman claims that no one has ever requested a divorce call.
Why you'd use it: iDump4U provides an easy way out of a breakup that may be overly emotional, awkward or potentially violent. Laborman, who handles each breakup himself, acts as a kind of mediator between the two parties who can't seem to work things out.
"Once a person wants to break up, the relationship is already over," Laborman said. "If you don't want to be with a person, and you take them a year and a half to tell them that, you've wasted a year and a half of their life. I'm saving a year and a half of your time."
But it's not a service you should choose lightly. Laborman refuses to perform "joke breakups" and cautions potential customers that there's little chance of reuniting once they've used iDump4U.
"Using my service is like burning a bridge," Laborman warns.
On the other hand, iDump4U does not guarantee a clean break. "Sometimes people just don't get it," Laborman said. In those cases, dissatisfied customers may seek a refund.
How to get it: To apply for the service, visit iDump4U.com and fill out a "Dump Now" registration form detailing your breakup request and verifying that you're over 18 years old.
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