I think most of us would like to change something. If we want to create a change that sticks we have to start on the inside.
We change our outer worlds working from the inside out.
I’m going to try to not get all woo woo and weird, but bear with me, you can take what resonates and dump the rest.
Think of the last time you made a new year's resolution. How well did you stick to it? How long did the intended change last?
I’m guessing not as long as you may have liked. If you're reading this on a treadmill right now-things may have worked out well for you ;)
We try new things and commit to change things, but so often we don't make long term changes because we literally only scratched the surface of why we want to do what we’re doing.
We need to move deeper to understand what’s going on behind the scenes. That can sound kind of weird but there are some key components that can help us working from the inside out.
Create more quiet in your life.
I can feel the resistance already.
You don't have to rearrange your whole life or quit your day job (you can if you like-call me and I'll help you make the transition to a more yummy fulfilling path :)
Simply make some space for quiet and do it on your terms. You can try mediation. There are lots of apps and support. If the thought of that makes you want to die a little. I get it, and God bless you, I send you a virtual hug-I used to feel the same way.
Savour a cup of tea/coffee/wine-no judgement here; nothing wrong with cocktails and quiet.
Put your phone away, turn off the ‘dinger’ that thing is the devil at the best of times. Double dare you to never put the sound back on-(ahhh- feel the ease already-now we can be BFFS)
Focus on its yumminess. Even 5 min of this liquid mindfulness can be grounding and make you more aware of the thoughts that distract you.
Even noticing the thoughts that take you away from that moment can be very insightful.
If it’s a constant bombardment of things you have to do it may show you not only how much you have on your plate and perhaps those need to be evaluated and see if they’re really the priorities that you seem to be making them. Here's a tool for that ( 4 D’s http://eepurl.com/ddWXyL )
Perhaps it’s an indication that you need a more trusted system of keeping track of things that need to get done. Some options here to help with that.On paper http://bit.ly/1DK735i with the help of technology http://bit.ly/2u6LDR0
When you spend more time in quiet you may notice some deeper unfinished business that needs to be tended to. Perhaps you feel resentful or you remember you need to circle back around to have a conversation with someone to create clarity.
Writing can be helpful in this case. Asking yourself what you need and answering that question for yourself. Write freely without judgement or editing. Then following up so you can create closure there. That may involve getting some support or setting up a time to talk with the other person when you’re ready.
Once you’ve created some stillness, noticed your brain clutter, then you can start to close up some open tabs in your brain and focus on what you want in your life.
One of the reasons that change doesn’t happen or stick is because it’s not attached to much. When you’ve gotten clear on your values (discover your values tool here http://eepurl.com/ddWXyL )
Then things get juiced up.
I work out and eat healthy daily for the past 15 years, having lost 30 lb and maintained the same size because of honour. I’ve been super blessed to have an amazing body (not the kind that I would put on a poster next to Cheryl Tiegs), but it's amazing nonetheless.
I am healthy, can move, and that’s such a gift! I want to honour the gift of my life lived out in this body of mine so I think what will honour this body-daily. That value of honour keeps my commitment a top priority. Some time cheesecake does honour my body too-it's all about balance.
You also need to get clear on what feels you’d like to feel. The change you long for maybe so much deeper than weight loss, but we'll look at that because a good cliche can still give us the wisdom we need.
Maybe you want to feel better in your skin, maybe you want to have more energy. Sink into that. Feel what it was like the last time you felt like that-even go way back to when you were a rock star kiddo, doing cart wheels on your front lawn-wasn't that awesome?!
What's that feeling? Is it freedom, play, lightness, badassery? ( I love that word and it motivates me) You can make up your own.
How will making this desired change help you feel that desired feeling? Then start taking some wee steps and make a plan to move ahead. All held together with the foundation of the values you want to honour and the feels you want to feel.
This is where the yum factor is upped BIG time and you start to feel great and motivated.
And guess what, You've got this and you can make the changes you long for and a wee secret, one change leads to another and to another and so on and so on and you’ll find yourself living a life you never thought was possible and it all may have started with a wee glass of liquid mindfulness. Cheers to that goodness!
And if I can help. I’d love to!