THE BLOG

I'm JUST a Mom

I'ma Mom who no longer knows what to tell her children when they ask why there is so much pain and hurt and "bad guys" in this world.
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

I'm just a Mom who no longer knows what to tell her children when they ask why there is so much pain and hurt and "bad guys" in this world.

I'm just a Mom who continually questions herself every single day, second guessing every decision and rethinking every move she's made.

I'm just a Mom who is no stranger to hard work, pure exhaustion, and reoccurring disappointments...despite her best efforts.

I'm just a Mom who is trying to instill a confidence and sense of self-worth in her daughters and a sheer drive of determination and respect in my son; reminding all four of her children to be fearless in their dreams.

I'm just a Mom who is continuing to fight what some think is an unrealistic battle; a battle for every working parent in our country to have a fighting chance to experience the most important thing in this world with their newborn. Time.

I'm just a Mom who still struggles trying to tell her children to always look for the good in the world, despite the horrific tragedies that befall every day. Because wherever there is tragedy, we can always find the "good guys" close by.

I'm just a Mom who continues to make mistakes each day, who breaks down in tears, who has trouble forgiving herself of what she failed to do or what she could have done better.

I'm just a Mom who is crazy enough to believe she can change the world, if she is persistent enough, knowing she has the most powerful One on her side.

I'm just a Mom who has worked several jobs at once yet still has come up short, having to scrape change out of her children's piggy banks, worrying how she will pay for the next overdue bill.

I'm just a Mom who has had to fake it more days than not; because if her children sense fear, then what has been gained from that?

I'm just a Mom who wants to be looked at as a hero, from the eyes of four tiny humans who are constantly watching, constantly learning, and constantly studying each and every move she makes.

I'm just a Mom who is no better than anyone else; a flawed woman who is her own worst critic, yet is trying to learn to love and accept herself a little more every single day.

I'm just a Mom who lives in a time where her heart will sink each time she kisses her children good-bye as they leave for school, for so many reasons, some of which should never have to cross her mind.

I'm just a Mom who has taken some big risks, in order to produce some big rewards, as she puts her head down and works tirelessly, as giving up isn't an option.

However, I'm one of the lucky ones.

Because I'm that Mom who felt convicted to continue on, to push past and go against what was considered the norm.

I'm that Mom who has learned one of the toughest lessons of parenthood and finally stopped caring about what others think and more about what her gut told her to do.

I'm that Mom that found an extra ounce of energy to push harder each time she felt like giving up, and has let her faith be much bigger than her fear.

I'm that Mom who is still a work in progress, but by God, trying to use each and every mistake to only better herself not only as a wife and mother...but as an individual.

Yes, I'm that Mom who has given herself no choice but to fail her way to success; going a little further even when her fuel tank was empty.

...and I'm that Mom who will continue to fight tooth and nail for this world to be a better place for her children and grandchildren.

I'm just a Mom who believes one day we'll get to say, we believed we could...and we did.