Introverts and parties probably go together as smoothly as oil and water. In other words, not well.
The personality type is known for prioritizing downtime and preferring silence and intimate conversations to small talk. That sometimes makes big social functions rather challenging to enjoy. However, it doesn’t mean that introverts avoid them entirely ― they just approach them differently than everybody else.
We asked members of our Facebook community to share some of the thoughts they have about attending parties as a “quiet type.” Here are just a few things introverts consider before, during and after a social gathering:
1. "I need an in-depth explanation of the plan."
"I need as many details about the event as possible. If it's something with total strangers, I can usually talk my way through it because it's all shallow pleasantries (although I'll still need a nap later and probably won't leave the house for days afterwards). If it's a big family event, I know the conversation will be deeper and more prodding, so I plan an exit just in case. After that I'll need a drink, a nap and a week of radio silence. I love people -- just, you know, one at a time and with fair warning." -- Courtney Mattocks Vrablik
2. "How far is it from now?"
"I must have notice for social gatherings. I can't just get a call and head over to someone's house." -- Stephanie Dawn Elizabeth
3. "Will someone I know be attending?"
"I usually try and find one person that I can talk to all night if I have to be there all night. If not, I leave after I've had my fill." -- Tamara Bielema
4. "Will there be a dog?"
"I'll try to find someone I feel really comfortable with. And at less formal event, if there's a dog around, I'll be patting it and plotting my stealthy escape." -- Martin Hay
"I also hope there will be pets. Pets are awesome and don't judge." -- Stephanie Norell
5. "Just smile and nod."
"I actually have to tell myself to focus on what other people are saying in social situations because my thoughts are always elsewhere. I also tend to stick with people I know very well to avoid small talk!" -- Anya Kelman
6. "I'm being really quiet."
"I often think 'How long is it going to take before someone makes a comment about how quiet I am?'" -- Danielle Elisabeth Deshaies
7. "I need some alone time."
"I'll find a large-ish group that I can sit with and listen to, or maybe one close friend I can talk with. After a while I need to go off on my own, though. And I can never go out two nights in a row. I need a day to process everything." -- Amy Self Porterfield
"I may take a few bathroom breaks throughout the event or take a quick walk outside for some air and a recharge. Introverts are not afraid to mingle or let loose and have fun, they simply don't want to do it all the time." -- Crystal Lynn
8. "When can I leave?"
"I'll stay as long as I feel comfortable. The moment I find that I'm getting exhausted by the socializing and just want to 'escape,' I do. Thankfully, my friends appreciate the person I am and know that me leaving has nothing to do with them or not enjoying myself." -- Toni White
9. "I need an exit strategy."
"I tell my husband, on the way to the event or before arriving, I have to leave at a certain time [so] I have a reason ready for my exit." -- Rebecca Duvall
"I used to feel uncomfortable about leaving when I was younger, but at this point, I know myself, and I'm not going to force myself to stay in a situation where I feel bad." -- Charlene Templeman
10. "Ahhh, finally free."
"I reward myself by going home to a pot of tea, Netflix and comfy clothes. Getting away from all of the noise and back into my own territory is the best part of the night." -- Angela Francescini
A little downtime? Now that's a party.
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