Whenever I talk about running, I shudder. It has never been my favourite activity. Back in the day, I used to get my lovely friend Ali out of bed at silly o’clock for a run. She hated the morning; I hated the running so we were both in pain. I imagine that we thought we were doing good things for our bodies by this mad torture. Luckily I found other things to treat my body to which I enjoyed much more.
These running shoes are not physical ones. They are more my metaphorical running away shoes.
Many styles of running shoes
As we might have many styles of shoes, what we run towards or away from will differ from person to person. I ran away from a not so great life and ran towards new opportunities a few ears ago. That was one aspect of my running. However, lurking in the hidden depths have been other things that I have been donning the shoes for.
In a recent conversation out came that old chestnut ‘fear of success.’ How many times have you or I shone a light on someone else while remaining in the shadows? How many times have you and I stopped a fraction away from success, for some seemingly inexplicable fear?
I know I have done both and it takes a lot of personal will power to stop doing ‘stuff’ for other people, finding your true north, shining your light and stepping over that invisible boundary.
Look at your feet now and create a picture of the running shoes that you might be wearing. Consider shape, colour, heels or flat, laces or Velcro, sparkly or plain, brand and anything else that comes into your head. Are they running to or running away from shoes?
If they are running away from shoes, please change the colours, make them sparkle, add a kitten heel (not the guys please), do something to make them more you, funkier, turn them into something you’d like to wear into the next phase of your life.
Are you taking a short run or long sprint?
When I made a decision to leave a situation that wasn’t serving me, it was definitely a long sprint. At different times, I’ve needed to take short runs to get away from people or situations for quickly. While I may be extrovert and love the company of others, I adore solitude with just me and the pooches and so running to ‘hide’ feels right.
What about you?
Decisions to run away build up over time, so when the time comes it often feels like a snap decision as you ‘sprint’ away. What has to happen to make you more aware of your running tendencies?
Sometimes it’s necessary to run away from life as you know it
Running away from stuff and finding space is a wonderful experience, to be savoured, as long as it doesn’t last forever. Even old runners dust off their shoes and go for a jog now and again. Run, do it, but have an exit strategy, a date, a sign or feeling that says at this point the running stops. Notice I don’t say when such and such happens then I will, because I believe ‘when and will’ enables us to get away with not taking action. When and will tell the mind it’s ok to procrastinate and we both know that is the road to hell. The right moment to stop running will make itself known to you. All you have to do is listen and be a witness to what has unfolded to give yourself space to float untethered into new opportunities.
Do you know what you are running away from?
Choosing dreadful relationships, boring jobs, manipulative friends and the list goes on, is your way of hiding your light. How do I know? Let’s just say been there, done that, got the t-shirt.
Yes, it’s scary to say ‘get lost’ to situations and people that don’t serve you, however, if you don’t, you will stay in a town called Purgatory for some time to come.
Write, journal, talk, reflect and discover who (or what) those gremlins are that you are holding on to. One by one hand them their marching orders and rather dull running shoes and tell them to take a hike.
Never have regrets
Your choices are your choices, whether you think they were wise or not. At the time when you acted them out, you had made a decision that you would do whatever it was. Ok, you may feel a little silly. You could apologise if it were that important and that’s sorry to you, your inner child or maybe someone else. The point is not to have regrets about what you did or didn’t do. Be grateful for who you have become because of the choices you made. Believe you me; it can only get better (even if it currently feels like a pile of poo…)
Some things that it’s cool to be running away from
Unhealthy relationship. What more can I say? Look over at your partner and tell me, does he/she light your fire? Do you want to wake up next to him/her for the rest of your life?
Unchallenging job. Hateful jobs that do not utilise your knowledge, skills, experience and aligned to your purpose are soul destroying. Feed your soul with a job you love.
Manipulative toxic people. As you start to build up your energy, it seems that they want to suck it right back out of you. Notice who they are and start to either protect yourself or walk away. Hell, no run like mad!
Friends who always take and give nothing in return. These aren’t the friends who require support in tough times. These are those other ones; you know who they are, don’t you?
The place in which you live. City life would be a killer for me. Living in the peace of the hills being Mother Nature is like rolling naked in nectar (not done it but it sounds nice). If you can, make plans to find an environment that wraps you in its arms. If moving is not an option, consider Feng Shui for your home, it makes such a difference.
Words that don’t serve you. Mind your communications. That mind of yours can be a bit of a she-devil. Stops the can’ts and shoulds. One of my long-standing ones is hearing myself say I hate my arms. Instead, I am telling my arms that I love them. Yes, this might sound nuts, and I have no idea where the arm hating came from. However, it’s not productive for me to hate anything about me. Catch yourself saying things, say thank you very much and then change the way in which you talk to yourself. Practice self-love instead.
The old you. Say thank you to old you. She was nice to know, she taught you a lot, you had some ups and downs, but now it’s time she put on her running shoes and headed down the track. The new you rocks and don’t you forget it.
What would you add to this list?
I got tired of running away and decided to face the things that needed to be addressed. Spending time laughing at my foibles helps. Please laugh at yours, because laughter is the best medicine.
This article was first published on http://consciouswomentribe.com.