In addition to their official statement, Jay Z (Jay Pharoah) and Solange (Sasheer Zamata) sat down with their questionably effective body guard (Kenan Thompson) to prove that they've moved on from the incident by replaying the security footage with that audio we've been waiting to hear.
Even Queen Bey herself (well, Maya Rudolph) took a break from making another "sexually aggressive music video about her monogamous relationship" to offer her own statement on the fight. Or just say the names of a bunch of her songs. It's hard to tell.
Watch the sketch above.