John Oliver Says FIFA Investigation Could Get The Entire World To Love America

John Oliver was stunned to find out that not only were a number of top FIFA officials arrested in connection with a corruption probe, but that it was due to an investigation by the one nation that cares the least about soccer: The United States.

Oliver is now hoping the U.S. goes after Sepp Blatter, president of FIFA, who was not part of the original indictment.

"If America keeps driving this investigation and actually finds something to indict him, I don't think you understand how much that would mean to everyone on Earth," Oliver said. "The whole world's opinion of America would change overnight."

To put it in perspective, he said it would be like Americans reacting to news that the Dutch had somehow locked up Donald Trump.

"You would think, 'Holy shit, the Dutch are awesome!'" Oliver said. "That is what's on the table for you, America."

Oliver, who blasted FIFA over corruption allegations last year, didn't limit his pleas to the U.S. Oliver also called out FIFA sponsors, urging them to take action and offering to pretend to like their products if they do.

"I would even make the ultimate sacrifice," Oliver said. "Budweiser: If you pull your support and help get rid of Blatter, I will put my mouth where my mouth is and I will personally drink one of your disgusting items."

Oliver said he would even drink a Bud Light Lime.

"All the lime in the world cannot disguise the fact that this tastes like a puddle beneath a Long John Silver's dumpster," he said, while holding up a bottle.

"I will drink one, maintaining eye contact with the camera and I will say it was delicious," Oliver said. "Because if you get rid of the Swiss demon who has ruined the sport I love, this stuff will taste like fucking champagne."

Check it out in the clip above.



John Oliver Quotes