Law Of Attraction: The Problematic Issues Of 'Fairness' And 'Deserving'

Remember what I said earlier about the neutrality of the process-input and output. This examination is the key to a deeper understanding of what is driving your experience, and that knowledge gives you the power to effect positive change.
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When we immerse ourselves in a teaching like the law of attraction, we will naturally start questioning our current beliefs, the paradigms in which we have been operating and our view of the world.

For me personally, one of the things I really started thinking more about were the ideas of 'deserving,' 'fairness, and 'karma.'

How many times have you felt that you didn't deserve something bad that happened to you? How many times have you felt like you were treated unfairly?

How many times have you witnessed something good happening to someone bad and thought he didn't deserve it? How many times have you witnessed something bad happening to someone good and thought she didn't deserve it?

The idea of 'karma' can be comforting to some. People that have done bad things will eventually get their comeuppance. People who have been good and decent will eventually be rewarded.

Often times, the concepts of karma and the law of attraction are seen as one in the same, but given the usual meaning people are assigning to 'karma' I don't think they are.

The energies and web of beliefs behind these concepts can be problematic in many ways, and exploring that more deeply can help clear out a lot of vibrational 'debris.'

There Is No Judge

The major issue with these concepts is the implication there is some force keeping tabs on us, judging us, and then delivering us our experiences as either some sort of punishment or reward.

I do believe there is some sort of force that transcends our physical reality, something that we will never have the full capacity to understand. But I fully believe this entity is nothing but pure love, devoid of any sort of judgment. No matter what we do, it only sees our true nature, our perfection.

Judgment is purely the purview of humans.

I fully believe this force is set up to work for us, and not against us. And as much as it is able to support us, it cannot defy our vibration. It delivers us experiences based on what we are putting out there, it has no choice. It's kind of like a computer--input and output.

In order to fully reap that support, we must hold up our end of the bargain by cultivating thoughts, beliefs and feelings that recognize this assistance, that recognize our true nature.

If we manifest certain experiences into our lives, it is because on some level, we were an energetic match to them; it is mirroring something back to us. What is being shown to us is not always obvious, much to our frustration. But that's a story for another day.

Again, unwanted manifestations are not any sort of punishment for something you did wrong or because you were thinking 'negative' thoughts. This idea of manifestations being some sort of punishment or reward for your mindset is one of the biggest misconceptions out there.

Manifestations are Just a Mirror

Manifestations are very personal and are the perfect thing to show someone what they need to see. We have no idea what other people's manifestations mean to them. So, if someone 'bad' manages to manifest something 'good' like a lot of money, that doesn't seem fair.

All the conscious creators out there are wondering why they have to work so much to raise their vibration to attract money when these people who aren't doing any of that inner work, and seem like crappy people to boot, get all that cash?

Again, manifestations are very personal and something that seems 'good' because we ourselves really would like to have it too, may not be so 'good' for someone else. In this case, we have no idea what 'role' the money is playing in his experience.

How many times have we heard the story of the lottery winner whose life went to crap after hitting those winning numbers, and usually losing it all? That money magnified all sorts of issues, beliefs and destructive behaviors.

Often times, manifestations are a result of a complex mix of factors and have many layers;and there is a tendency to oversimplify an idea like the law of attraction.

It often gets boiled down to think positive thoughts and good things happen, think negative thoughts and bad things will happen. But there is more to it than that.

Once you get more into this work, there is often a tendency to start analyzing other people's lives from this perspective, wondering how they manifested what they did,etc... I would highly recommend refraining from this as best you can, and focus on yourself.

These Concepts Cause All Sorts of Problems

I believe our feelings help us recognize things that are true and untrue. They serve as kind of a conduit between 'big' us who knows what's up and 'little' human us, who for the most part ,ain't got a clue, and is firmly entrenched in this grand illusion we have created for ourselves.

There is a reason thinking your life is in the hands of some outside force judging whether you are deserving of what you want, and directing the course of your life, feels badly--it's not true.

There is a reason thinking there is no rhyme or reason to our existence here, life's a crap shoot and you're all on your own feels really badly--it's not true.

If we hold to these ideas of 'deserving' and 'fairness,' we will have a very hard time being a conscious participant in how our life unfolds because at the root of these concepts is the idea that it's out of our control, or that we are owed something.

And a little side note here: When I say 'control' I don't mean manipulating reality to turn out exactly as your mind wants it at each and every turn; when I talk about being in control, I mean cultivating a certain energy that will lend itself to better things making their way in--our energy is truly the only thing we can control.

There is a big tendency to carry over these concepts into your work with conscious creation; and you will quickly find yourself getting frustrated that all your 'efforts' at trying to bring certain things into your life are not being 'rewarded' by the Universe.

It seems 'unfair' that you are trying so hard and you still aren't getting whatever it is you have set your sights on, and you start feeling sorry for yourself, or you start questioning whether you 'deserve' to get what you want.

And by the way, yes, yes you do deserve it--your sheer existence makes you worthy and deserving of the best life has to offer. Deserving is not based on what you have contributed or whether you have been a 'good' person.

So you have to being willing to be really honest with yourself in assessing how well-aligned you may be with the various things you hope to manifest. You have to switch into the mode of being deserving by nature, rather than deserving because you have paid your dues, have done the right thing, have followed all the rules, have suffered and sacrificed, have been trying really hard, and so on.

Another reason these concepts can be problematic is because they often lead us to do all sorts of things we don't want to do, and neglect ourselves in all sorts of ways, because we think these particular decisions make us a 'good' person.

And even if we are suffering now in some way, we will be 'rewarded' for our sacrifice, for doing the 'right' thing, or for putting other people's needs and happiness above our own.

But you can't get to a good-feeling place traveling a path that feels badly, and when you operate from this sort of space, you'll tend to just manifest more instances of sacrifice, being taken advantage of and self-neglect.

These are pretty deeply ingrained beliefs, and you probably won't just chuck them immediately. Even the most 'advanced' among us probably have these sorts of thoughts pop in from time to time, whether in regards to something that happens in our own life, or someone else's.

Just be vigilant of when you are feeling these things strongly, and...

Be Willing to Investigate

The next time you find yourself experiencing something that you don't think is fair ,or that you think you didn't deserve, don't be afraid to dive in. What beliefs and feelings are being triggered? What do you think may have led to attracting this experience? What in particular is making you feel badly?

When investigating how you may have manifested the situation, it is so crucial to remember this isn't about blaming yourself--the word 'attract' can have a negative connotation that many take to mean 'had it coming,' 'you brought it on yourself,' you somehow wanted this bad thing to happen or it was some sort of punishment for a negative mindset.

And that's just pure nonsense spouted by people who have very little understanding of what a teaching like this is actually saying, and just want to shut it down immediately so they don't have to deal with the discomfort of having their views challenged, views that have probably caused all sorts of pain,feelings of disempowerment and doing things they didn't want to do. But I digress...

Remember what I said earlier about the neutrality of the process-input and output. This examination is the key to a deeper understanding of what is driving your experience, and that knowledge gives you the power to effect positive change.

Kelli Cooper is a coach specializing in the law of attraction. For more information on conscious creation, visit her blog Life Made to Order.

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