For most of my life I believed that I was quiet, shy, not outgoing, and mean because that’s what I was always told growing up. There is this one particular time that has remained stuck in my head for over 10 years. So, my younger sister, Amanda, and I were both teenagers which meant we were old enough to finally get our first jobs. I remember we both brought home applications from Taco Bell and filled them out all excitedly. When we were done, we left them on the dining room table and my mother’s boyfriend at the time walked by and seen them and said, “I reckon Amanda will get it before Kindall do because she’s more outgoing.” Those simple words made me feel so hopeless and pessimistic like I would never have anything I want out of life because of who I thought I was a person.
“I thought for a long time that everything about me was wrong.”
As I got older I realized, I am not “wrong,” but different. I slowly began to understand that I am an introvert and not all the basic ass things I was labeled as growing up. Now, I am unapologetic about who I am and if you’re a misunderstood introvert like me, join me in raising our middle fingers up to the ones that prejudged and mislabeled us and let’s set them straight.
I Am Not Shy or Quiet
If you think this, I probably just find what you have to say uninteresting or unimportant; talking to you will literally, drain TF out of me so I’d rather just keep to myself. I don’t do small talk, period. It’s either big talk or nothing. If you have something to say that I have an opinion on, you won’t be able to shut me up. If all you know how to do is awkward ass small talk or just refuse to be open, I have nothing to say to you. Doesn't mean I don't like you, (I probably don’t care for you) just means I feel no need to force conversation with you. Life's too damn short for forced conversations. You have to be really talking about something for an introvert to come out of their thoughts and talk to you.
I AM Outgoing AF
I am thinking of a master plan in my head right now as I write this on THE Huffington Post contributor platform that I had to GO after to get. One thing about us introverts is that since we don’t do a whole lot of talking, we do a whole lot of “walking.” We think it and then do it. Especially if we want it bad enough and have done nothing but think about it. In fact, we’ve thought about it so much and have envisioned it so vividly in our minds that we won’t stop until it becomes a reality. We are the epitome of the mantra, “You are what you think!” Take that for outgoing.
I Am NOT Mean
To know me is to love me. If I see you and just keep walking by without speaking, it either means I don’t feel like being trapped in awkward small talk with you or I was just lost in my thoughts. If I let you in, you’re always going to get the REAL me. The fact that I even let you in means I find you interesting and actually like talking to you. If you think I’m mean, you just don’t know me and I probably don’t WANT you to know me. Introverts could care less about having a lot of associates and friends. If we mesh, then we just mesh and If we mesh, we will mesh FOREVER because we hold on to people that just get us. We are a rare, often misunderstood kind so if we hit it off, we will talk your ear off whenever we get a chance.
I DO Like To Go Out And Turn TF Up!
I love a good time; especially with my peoples that I mesh with. I usually turn up more than my friends do when we go out. Us, introverts do like to get out of our minds and thoughts for a minute because being a thinker can be overwhelming at times. So, when we turn up, we turn TF up! Don’t let our usually to ourselves demeanor fool you. Best believe though, you may not get us out the house for another month. Enjoy your turn up time with us while you can. We HAVE to retreat often.
Just to think, I almost let who I am become my weakness. Uneducated, ignorant and close minded ass people almost made me feel too weird to function in this normal life. There is more than one way to be. Accepting that I am different has ultimately helped me to not be so quick to judge anyone else. Accepting my differences have enabled me to accept other’s differences too. So, either try taking time to get to know someone that is an introvert or just leave us the hell alone and go find other “surfacey” people that love to small talk too.