I want to talk about how to listen to your heart and why it’s important.
The recent collective upheaval has struck with force, and on Monday, I was viscerally swept up by the impact of world events in a painful, deep heartache sort of way.
What I did on Monday was this: I sat with my emotions, let myself feel all of them, and what I found was that by attending to what was going on without judgment or expectation, the next day, that vortex of strong pain was no longer with me. I was back into the flow of expression and of my life, fully engaged again. Now, it doesn't always work that quickly and even I was surprised.
I want to encourage you to be with your truth, too, in the same way that I got intimate with what was going on for me. Not necessarily about world events, unless that calls to you, but rather about the subject of YOU.
The more I work with women and in my own life, the more I see that wisdom of the heart has been left out of the equation of living well. No surprise.
We have been living in a dominantly rational, left-brain world for generations, and it has left us isolated from our whole, true selves. We jump from theory to theory, from book to book, specialist to specialist, looking for someplace to land. And little changes for us. We want to be cool and accepted, so we join what others join and do what they do. But you?
Who are you in all this noise — really?
This is what I find so prevalent, the loss of our inner compass and Self, of the who-I-am that is bigger than the personality, mask or the ego identifications that we all have.
The ability to connect to what is bigger than that in us, is at times a lost art.
We often don't even know what we want, because the culture has had such an influence, and we believe what we read and what looks like happiness for others.
And then we have such a hard time being happy or content ourselves.
Instead, we become slaves to someone else's messages that we don't know are true for us.
If you are not rooted in yourself, you will quickly feel the constraints and pain of bad choices.
Thinking is grist for the mill of the wise heart
Thinking is not effective on its own. We believe we can figure our lives out by thinking everything through. But knowledge that turns into wisdom is a full body, mind and heart experience, of which thought is only one part. You can look out there to see into which circles you might fit into, or find out what is the exact right spot for you - by staying in your heart. By asking your heart to process information and ideas and listening until you know. That’s the appropriate moment for the head to figure out how to get you where you want to go.
We have misplaced this heart-way of knowing and because of that, we have become lost, too.
And if you think it is different for me, it is not
I have to dip into my heart several times a day with reminders and time for stillness. If not, I lose myself, my rootedness, and don't know what's important, where to focus, and what I am here for.
The mind handles what it already knows while the heart holds the key to the unknown, the invisible, the mystery. This ability to find wisdom used to be natural, common knowledge.
If you are interested, here's a way to do this
Choose a quiet, uninterrupted time and space, and with your eyes closed, or soft-focused, begin the inquiry.
How does your body feel? What do you notice, and where? There’s nothing you have to do but be with what is, exactly as it is. Listen until you know.
What emotions are present in your body. Where does sadness live? Anger? What else is there? Stay here, until you are done.
What thoughts are surfacing? Can you watch them without making them good or bad? Can you be curious?
Gently, slowly, breathe into your heart, high in your chest, just below the dip where the clavicle bones meet, and be there.
Notice how you have been longing to slow down so you could catch up with yourself, become intimate with the person you are today, in this moment, in this tiny speck of time.
Let all the body sensations, emotions and thoughts pass through your heart, and lean back into the soft warm arms of your deep, slow breathing. Be open and grow intimate with what shows up.
Hold yourself close, tenderly, and with gentleness.
Don’t run away. Stay.
Don’t abandon yourself to busyness. Stay.
Let impressions emerge and have no expectations.
Let yourself dip into this heart space often in your day.
Make a habit of asking your heart — what’s right for me here, now?
You will need to learn to distinguish your head’s voice from your heart’s. At first, you might not know the difference.
It will be worth it.
Of course you can.
P.S. If you think others might benefit, share generously. Thank you.