Real Life. Real News. Real Voices.
Help us tell more of the stories that matter from voices that too often remain unheard.
Join HuffPost Plus
thinner_close_xCreated with Sketch.


What do you stand for? Who do you choose to be? Why are you here? I understand that it can be very difficult today to answer these questions given all the different voices around.
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

"The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

What do you stand for? Who do you choose to be? Why are you here? I understand that it can be very difficult today to answer these questions given all the different voices around. There are parents, societies and traditions that are constantly telling you who you should be. They can get so loud that it becomes difficult to hear your own voice underneath the unspoken words and the silent screaming.

This is why it is even more important to consciously ask yourself a few things. Whose thoughts are you thinking? Are you doing the things you are doing because someone else wants you to do them or because you want to do them? Whose definition of a "proper" job do you take on? Whose feelings are you actually feeling? Have you ever stopped to check if that is still you inside there?

I am not talking about occasionally scratching on the surface-deep issues like this, but really taking a timeout for yourself to think about these questions. Thoughts have the power to create, yet only if combined with feeling them. Hence, feelings are even more powerful creators. Most of the time, however, the thinking is already done unconsciously. This is dangerous, because you are handing over the reins and your feelings are thus mastering you instead of the other way around.

It's time to wake up, moment by moment, from of your "I'm fine," comfort zone and be brutally honest with yourself. What do you stand for? Who do you choose to be? Why are you here? Are you living up to your answers? If not, are you willing to take actions to step into who you always wanted to be?

When you are brave enough to be your true self, you will see that there is all the support in the world, and beyond, for you. Literally beyond. Life and this amazing universe have a habit of showing up for you the moment you show up for yourself. Help may not always arrive in the form you would expect, but it's there to have your back and to motivate you to keep going even -- and especially -- when things gets difficult.

No matter your age, profession, gender, bank balance or belief system, never be afraid to ask for help. It will come. You will not be able to see past it. Do not fear being overwhelmed by it, it will present itself to you exactly in the portions that you can handle right now. When you choose to be 100-percent you, you will get 100-percent authentic divine support (and I am talking 24/7, here).

It may be through the book you are reading right now, the song you are listening to, a friend's advice, a kind smile from a stranger or a job at the company you were bold enough to apply for, not because you expected anything, but because you cared. And this is what it all comes down to in the end. Care instead of can. Feel what you are doing and what you are doing it for. There can be two equally-skilled people working in the same field. The one, however, who doesn't just share his knowledge, but puts his heart into the matter will ultimately be the one who can connect to people and who will be successful in the end. You want to be that person.

Now, I am not suggesting that you quit your job or your studies all of a sudden because you don't feel the lectures or the business meetings are triggering your passions. My advice is to actually tap into your job or studies and see if there's a true connection between it and you, or if there is only a connection you let yourself be talked into by various voices outside of you. The answer, however, always lies inside of you. Ask yourself. Is this really me? If not, don't be afraid to change course. Don't do it head over heels. But also, don't wait to do it from a safe bulletproof point in life, because this point won't come. Sometimes, you must dare to jump. And while feeling (not thinking) the jump, you will recognize a deep trust that resides in you. One that tells you that you will always be held, no matter how high the fall. The truth is, you are not falling -- you are flying.

So before you go to sleep tonight, I would kindly ask you to be as transparent as possible, and as honest as you dare to be. What do you stand for? Who do you choose to be? Why are you here? And ultimately, what do you wish to bring into this world? Be warned though, these answers might just profoundly change your life if you dare ask them. They did for me.

With love and light,


For more by Raluca A. Ray, click here.

For more on happiness, click here.