When you've spent years or decades with your spouse, the thought of living on your own again post-split can be a terrifying one. Who's going to take the kids to school when I'm sick? you wonder. Do we need to downsize? And what in the hell am I supposed to do with the rest of the bed? (The answer to that last question? Claim it. Every single inch now belongs to you and that is a beautiful thing.)
But before you know it, you'll not only get used to living on your own -- you'll embrace it. Take it from HuffPost Divorce readers. Below, they share what they love most about having the whole house to themselves since the divorce.
1. "I've learned what I'm capable of. I never thought I could raise two boys on my own, but we're learning and growing together. We're making memories."
2. "The best thing is not having to invite his toxic family over to my house anymore. Now that I'm single, I have more time on my own and that gives me the energy to be the mom I was meant to be. It feels like I'm my complete self again."
3. "You can drink straight from the milk and juice containers with zero judgement."
4. "I yell a lot less. When we were still together, I was tense all the time from trying not to upset my ex. Unfortunately, I usually lashed out at my young son because of it. We're happier now."
5. "You don't have the other parent there to contradict everything you say or do as a parent. Seeing eye-to-eye on how we would raise the kids when we were together was so stressful."
6. "The best part of living with the kids and no ex-husband? The smiles and the knowledge that I don't have to walk on egg shells anymore."
7. "We take life at our own pace at my house now. My boys get the best of their dad and the best of me without seeing us make each other unhappy. I hate that it didn't work out but I am happy that they can learn from our mistakes. Hopefully they will wait longer and think harder before they get hitched."
8. "I make the rules. I'm the boss. I do what I want and answer only to myself. And decor-wise, anything goes: we finally have family pictures on the wall. Our house is a home."
9. "My house can be messy and that's OK. Everyone is happy, even if we get annoyed with each other sometimes. (What family doesn't?) We have fun and we get to be loud. And personally, I can stay up late and not feel guilty about it."
10. "The best part is embracing your freedom and learning to be alone, not lonely. You have the potential to be a much better partner to someone once you learn you can rely on yourself."
11. "It's the small things: Letting the dog sleep in my bed, having full control of the television remote."
12. "I used to have a third child in the home: My ex. Now that he's gone, I'm no longer responsible for him, thank goodness."
13. "My house is finally the safe place it was always supposed to be for me and the kids. My kids are happier and healthier than before. They're calmer, less violent, better listeners and more cooperative -- they actually want to help out around the house! It's so good being on our own. They're allowed to be their awesome selves for the first time in forever and I honestly haven't been this satisfied with my life in years.
14. "There are no more arguments about little things like flushing the toilet or the plans he failed to tell me about. We fought constantly when we were married and we all know a house divided cannot stand."
15. "I can manage the kids much better without the negativity and disruption my ex used to bring home every day."
16. "I think the kids said it best: 'We get to laugh again.' He may have got all the money in our divorce, but I got full custody and my kids and I are rich in love and laughter."
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