Local News Alert: Dirty Old Man Not As Dirty As His License Plate Suggests (VIDEO)

WPIX New York, the flagship station of the CW, ran a news package last night on a man with a sleazy license plate. Henry DeRossi is a 78-year-old family man whose vanity plate reads "XXX Pert," which he says is in reference to his expertise in scrap metal, also he thought it was "funny as hell." He then goes on the say he can't really remember why he got it.

Local news strikes again! Uncovering the deeply personal stories of cities and neighborhoods such as how your child could accidentally slit their wrists with Triscuits, and how an old man made a stupid life choice. The package ends with the reporter saying, "All jokes aside, that was a joke," which gives you hope that this has all been some sort of post-modern satire, but no, he keeps talking and explains nobody really cares about the license plates and if they did the old man would remove them.