How you feel about yourself is the most important thing in life!
DO YOU REMEMBER a time when you were madly in love? Wasn't it a wonderful time? Everything was great - things flowed, you glowed and life was amazing! All because you were in love. But with whom? In truth, it was with yourself!
When someone else is madly in love with you, they see you in your true perfection! No warts, no projections - nothing but the wonderful you that is always inside - but generally covered with wounds and fear!
When one other person sees the true you - you too can see it and I honestly believe at that time, you fall in love with yourself. We are full of joy and so is life.
This is all great until the one we love starts to see our warts - or we start to see theirs! Suddenly you and they are no longer perfect and all the hidden fears, doubts, old patterns and self consciousness return. We fall out of love with ourselves. And life goes back to its usual patterns and we feel miserable again. All we want is to find our "perfect" partner and we will be happy and joy filled again!
NO we won't! Well, not for long anyway! What we need to do is to fall in love with ourselves again - to realize we truly are worth loving no matter what your beliefs tell you. You ARE good enough. In fact, you are MORE than good enough to be lovable. You ARE lovable and worth loving. Don't even let anyone tell you otherwise.
It took me until I was 55 to learn that I really didn't believe, deep in my heart, that I was worth loving. It took lots of work and effort - and still does - to change that belief!
The greatest gift I could give you is to alert you to this fear that most of us have deep inside - often from insignificant and innocent things our parents did. As small children we see the whole world revolving around us and interpret everything that way. Mummy or Daddy leaves and it's out fault. Daddy drinks (but we don't understand) and behaves strangely and it must be because we are not being good enough or we are not lovable.
I could go on and on. Look deeply into your beliefs. Is this a core fear for you? That you are not worth loving, lovable or good enough? Look at the patterns in your life and see if they reflect that belief. It's rarely a conscious belief until you think about it - like now!
Then visit your heart. The truth is always there. In your heart, from your hearts perspective, you will see the real you. The wonderful, lovable, joyful, 'in love' person that you were at the time someone else truly 'saw' you and loved you.
Keep looking - you ARE there!
Amanda Gore
Director, The Joy Project www.thejoyproject.com www.amandagore.com
For more by Amanda Gore, click here.