Insecurity kills more dreams than lack of talent does. Believing things like "I'll never get promoted" or "I can't compete with the other businesses" will turn your self-doubt into a self-fulfilling prophecy.
All of us experience self-doubt sometimes, no matter how confident we are. But mentally strong people don't let self-doubt prevent them from reaching their goals. Here's how to keep self-doubt from holding you back.
1. Embrace a little self-doubt.
Don't worry about a little self-doubt, because slight insecurity could actually bolster your performance. A 2010 study published in Psychology of Sport and Exercise found that individuals who experienced a little self-doubt actually performed better compared with people who were completely confident in their skills. Other studies have found similar results.
So rather than waste energy worrying that your self-doubt is really a sign from the universe warning you that you're about to fail, recognize that self-doubt can be helpful. Perhaps you'll spend more time rehearsing or maybe you'll put in more effort when you're aware that there's a chance it might not go smoothly.
2. Examine the evidence behind your thoughts.
When you encounter serious self-doubt, examine the truth behind your thoughts. Ask yourself, "What evidence do I have that I can't do this?" Then ask yourself, "What evidence do I have that I can do this?" Write down your answers on a piece of a paper.
Looking at the facts can help you see things in a more realistic manner. Although this exercise may not eliminate all of your self-doubt, examining the facts can help reduce your insecurities to a more helpful level.
3. Consider the worst-case scenario.
Self-doubt is fueled by catastrophic predictions like, "I'm going to mess everything up." When you find yourself guessing things will go poorly, ask, "What's really the worst thing that could happen?" If you do make a mistake, would it really be that bad?
Remind yourself that even if things go terribly, it's unlikely to be life altering. Losing a game, stumbling over your lines, or failing to get a promotion probably won't matter that much in a few years. Keeping things in proper perspective can help calm your nerves.
4. Monitor your emotions.
Your emotions play a major role in how you think and behave. Anxious feelings can fuel doubtful thoughts and impair your performance, unless you take steps to regulate your emotions.
Pay attention to how your emotions influence your choices. If your anxiety skyrockets, calm your body and your mind by taking deep breaths, going for a walk, or distracting yourself with mundane tasks. Don't allow your short-term discomfort to convince you to bail out, give up, or cave in.
5. Focus on your present performance.
Whether you're stepping on a stage or running out onto an athletic field, telling yourself, "I'm going to embarrass myself" will distract you from your performance. So rather than allow your inner monologue to drag you down, stay focused on the present.
Before you take the giant leap into whatever you're feeling doubtful about, give yourself a quick pep talk. Saying, "All I can do is my best" will remind you that you don't need to strive for perfection. With that reminder, you'll be better equipped to put your energy where it needs to be -- on your performance.
Amy Morin is a psychotherapist, keynote speaker, and the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do, a bestselling book that is being translated into more than 20 languages. She trains individuals , corporations, and agencies to build mental strength through her online courses, workshops, and speaking engagements.
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