Misfortune Cookies Tell It Like It Is (PHOTOS)

Read 'em and weep.

We've all heard of bad fortune cookies. There are the ones that don't make any sense, the completely bizarre ones, the massive fails and the ones that even scare us a little.

If you want to take the gamble out of the fortune cookie guessing game, look no further than Misfortune Cookies, which will guarantee you a sh*tty fortune every time.

fortune cookie

Misfortune Cookies think they're doing you a service -- the company is just telling you how it is.

"Crack open your damned miserable reality," the product details say. The cookies are the "perfect sobering accompaniment to a Chinese takeaway" if you can "face the brutal truth."

And just in case you were confused about how to enjoy your Misfortune Cookie, the company offers instructions, and doesn't sugar-coat things either:

Deal them out to your unfortunate friends, or sit alone and unlock your hopeless reality as you morbidly stuff down mouthfuls of Chinese food and ponder your own wretched existence.

Wait a minute -- aren't cookies supposed to make us feel better? If you need a pick-me-up after reading these "misfortunes," we've got your back. If you prefer to linger in the sobering reality of your miserable existence, Misfortune Cookies are available on Firebox.com for $19.69.

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Surprising Fortune Cookies