That picture above is me. About to pop. The day before I went into labor 4 years ago. Leading my yoga final after hiking a few miles into the forest.
As I write this, 4 years ago to the minute, I was at the glorious end of a 3-day labor. Giving birth to my child.
I had no idea what I was in for.
Tonight, it’s my baby’s 4th birthday. As he sleeps, I stare at his growing form in awe.
What an absolute miracle. And I made that.
I like to joke, “my womb did that.”
I smirk as I say this not at all tongue-in-cheek feminist battle-cry.
Because, f-it. It’s true. It did. And like every other life-giving being, I deserve to be proud as hell of something we so often aren’t celebrating. As my doula, Pati Garcia, once told me, if men had wombs we’d never stop hearing the bragging about all they can do. How they grow in size, change color, grow an organ, and more.
Damn! Right? Grow a little person. My WOMB did that.
Yes, I just put an ultrasound picture in a blog post. 8 weeks. And now he’s a little man. Damn. My WOMB did that.
And at the same time as I was doing everything, I did perhaps the hardest thing to do. Surrender completely to the process. And truly, that made me. Makes me, reshapes me. Just as my body is different, softer in some places, stronger in others, I am changed and changing. Softer and stronger inside too.
I think we forget sometimes about this brilliant, creative, contradiction.
Confidence in our power and, simultaneously, complete surrender.
So let’s make this a CREATIVE MANIFESTO.
What are you creating? Exude confidence. Bleed it. Be proud of it. Shout it from the rooftops. Or whisper to yourself with a smile. You did that. You are doing it.
Women especially, we don’t do enough owning of our creative power. And this isn’t just about physically birthing life. This is about all that we do. Whatever we are bringing forth into the world. A relationship, a healthy life, works of art, a calling.
Owning our power, taking credit. Saying “my womb did that.” Or my brain, or heart, or whatever.
And then surrendering it up.
As a baby grew inside my womb, it was the most humbling thing. Little eyes, feet, hands, a heart, Life was forming. And I wasn’t consciously doing any of it. While at the same time I was basically running a marathon of life while sitting still. Or more often, while also working as a teacher.
In the same way, the biggest contributions of my life I have set in motion, and then gotten out of the way as they unfold.
Let go of control and let life’s longing for itself take over. What can be surrendered, offered up, released?
Because what my womb did was really just create a space with the right conditions for my child to form himself.
And if we really get down to it, that’s the best creative conditions we can do. Create a space, and then let the creation take over, right?
So right on. What are you confidently creating? Surrendering?
I want to hear and see your own Creative Manifestations and Manifestos!
I’m passionate about self-care, yoga, birthing and nurturing leaders in uplift, community empowerment and your growth. I’m about to launch a Wellness School. Learn more and take your yoga deeper on and off the mat. Connect with me at www.SusannaBarkataki.com.