Netherworld

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Time exists for wonderment. <br>Musee d'Orsay.
Time exists for wonderment.
Musee d'Orsay.
Photo by Emily Eden.

If you’re an impatient person, you’re constantly battling the undefeated nemesis that goes by the name of ‘time’. No matter how you try or what cunning tactics you devise, you will never win.

Living in the city that never sleeps there is never enough time to accomplish everything your heart desires. Whether it’s an attempt to visit every pizza parlour in the borough of Manhattan or date a member of the opposite sex from every state, you will not find the time. You can make the time, after all nothing is impossible- Frodo did deliver the ring to Mordor. But I would bet my pug, you will be distracted from set out mission before completing the task ahead. And before you know it, time is no longer on your side.

We are constantly being told that time is of the essence and precious. That one should live in the present moment to be content. And yet we constantly have our eye on the next ‘prize’ (be it a pizza slice made from a special yam found only in the Andes or a Bachelor in Paradise-reject boyfriend).

Even though our minds and hearts may have desires, we do not get to choose when they arrive. And this is a constant struggle for those of us who have little patience. Which nowadays is most of us given that we live in a world of instant gratification. A place where we can have anything from sex to gin within minutes as a result of some app.

This past year I have come so close to having everything I wish to have in my life- my dream role and my dream man. However, turns out I was not ‘exotic’ enough for the role, and the universe wants me to keep dating in this mad metropolis until this guy realizes I am the prize (ooo snap!).

Admittedly it sucks balls not to have everything I want to happen to have happened by now. I had to re-sign the lease to my apartment meaning I still have no doorman to intercept packages - all a result of me being the wrong ethnicity for the role opposite Will bloody Ferrell (USPS is a terrifying ordeal for those of you unfamiliar with it- think Walking Dead Season 3...). As for the ‘man of my dreams’- just when i felt I figured out the ‘you just know when it’s the one’ sentiment, there I was catapulted- like a cow at the French in Monty Python- back to the realm of limbo and uncertainty. To the place that resembles the Netherworld waiting room from Beetlejuice with the shrunken head character. A place where nothing makes sense. A home to feeling hopeless.

When I find myself back in this particular place, sayings my Nan used to say to me come to mind like ‘Some people take the highway but you’re taking the scenic route’. And ‘You always fall into a bucket of shit and come up smelling like roses’.

These sentiments remind me that everything happens when it is supposed to. And for the better. Some things when you least expect them- like finding out you are pregnant (or in my case waking up with a hangover and a puppy after a heavy night of downing a plethora of shots in a dive bar). You really cannot control time. So all you can do is make peace and treat it like a friend, an ally working in tandem with you.

If something is meant for you it will happen. Blimey! If I didn’t believe this I would be a sobbing mess after every unsuccessful audition- I would literally resemble the ‘Leave Britney Alone Guy’ all day long. Or be making a Blair Witch themed video diary after every date, trembling in fear into my i-phone on selfie mode- snotty nostrils and all.

Oppositely, I would rather be patient for the things I want, as should you. Have faith and trust. Believe that you can have everything you want in life. You deserve them. You just don’t get to decide when.

Be coeval with now and grateful for today. Patience is the key to being present.

You will never have the same day twice. Because life is a scenic wonderful journey. An adventure we are not destined to accelerate through. And it’s pretty spectacular.

So pour yourself a cup of tea or coffee and relax. Enjoy it.