I felt different today. Yesterday I had my last working day as The Chocolate Fairy, leaving a big part of my life behind as I move forward into a new chapter. Is it scary? Is it painful?
Of course it is. But I made a choice, to not dim my light, to stop playing small and to be the best version of myself, EVERY SINGLE DAY.
Since 2016 started I went through a massive transformation, did deep inner work, looked at the cage of rules, of beliefs and opinions, of my own thoughts and patterns that kept me in a place where I felt stuck. And bit by bit I broke it down and built it back up, into something so much bigger and better that I struggle to grasp it fully yet.
And then the last week happened. It is as if I stepped into a new reality, so much changed and fell into place. And I cried so much, releasing old patterns and stuck energy with the help from friends and the support of the beautiful community I found over the last months and years.
And I decided: No more hiding. I want to be me, all of me, with everything I have to show and give and I want to spread my message of self love as far as I can.
I dreamed of mermaid hair since I first saw a girl with it, about 6 years ago. It took me 6 years to get to the point where I love myself enough to allowed myself to look the way I want to look, to show the vibrant colours I carry inside on the outside too.
And with this simple step yesterday I ticked off the last point on a list that I made in my darkest times, when I was sitting in a room at the closed ward of a psychiatry 10 years ago, drugged up to my eyeballs with medication to help me stay alive, numb my feelings, not try to kill myself again.
This list included
* finding the man of my dreams
* marrying him
* see the world
* have children
* take care of myself
* live in a house with a big garden
* have a nice car
* live in financial security
* make every day beautiful
* have friends all over the world
* make a difference
* find myself beautiful, love, honour and accept myself inside and out
And today, looking in the mirror, I realise that I have all these things in my life. A new chapter begins.
My dreams are bigger, bolder and I crave the change, the learning and growing that will come with working towards them. It took me ten years, and all of this and much more just happened because
I NEVER GAVE UP!
So, my love, can I ask you, just for today, to NOT give up? To keep moving, putting one foot in front of the other?
Because I’m here to prove that when you set your mind to it you’re able to achieve it. Search for support, for the people around you that will celebrate you when you win and hold you when you’re in a dark place. AND NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP!
My soul honours your soul!
Annika is an Intuitive Happiness Coach and Birth Guide, helping woman connecting to their true essence and following their heart’s desire. She lives with her husband and her two little boys in the magical South-West of Ireland.
Her days are filled with love and laughter, making time instead of chasing it, long walks in nature and good, wholesome food. She deeply believes in learning, growing and changing every day, in divine timing, happiness through presence, equality and celebrating diversity. She wants to live in a world where we all act and react from love and make conscious choices how we live our lives. She’s doing her part to make a difference over at Happy Place Living and Happy Place Birthing.