New Calif. Prop: The Elimination of Divorce Rights

Now that the Mormon Church, the Roman Catholic Church and several African-American churches have joined in a holy alliance to pass California's Prop. 8, it is time to eliminate the rights of different-sex couples to obtain a divorce. How could the proponents of traditional marriage not rally to support such a measure? Homosexuals and divorce lawyers. What two groups have done more to destabilize the American family? Actually, divorce lawyers are worse.

The threat of losing their tax-free status did not deter Christian churches from raising money and gathering signatures to put Prop. 8 on the ballot. These institutions will undoubtedly be willing to open their doors to this new movement without fear of retaliation from the IRS.

The divorce rate among African Americans is a little higher than the national average. This is not an insurmountable problem in getting this group's support. As Jon Stewart of The Daily Show recently put it regarding that phenomenal 70% of blacks who supported Prop. 8, "The oppressed has become the oppressor." It can happen again.

Mormons are less of a challenge. Who needs divorce when you've already got a few wives to choose from when one of your underage cousin brides acts up? And of course, Catholics can go right to the top on this one: the pope. Remember, it is not that long ago that the Vatican actively politicked against making divorce legal in Italy. Ireland, too.

The Mormons in Utah, Nevada and Colorado swelled the Yes on Prop. 8 coffers to nearly $20 million. Let's think big here. Out-of-state money is peanuts. Out-of-country money is the real manna.

God is on our side. The Bible condemns divorce just as it condemns homosexuals. That 33-year-old bachelor Jesus Christ never trashed gays but he did get pretty riled up about tossing your spouse. Best of all, while the Ten Commandments are silent on the issue of sexual orientation, we should be able to run with "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife" in print and TV ads. Just like Leviticus failed to add anything about "laying down with another woman," the commandments somehow ignore whether you can ogle thy neighbor's husband. These are unfortunate oversights in the Good Book, but nothing a Pepperdine theologian can't help us massage.

The children need to be protected from the devastation of broken homes.

No one gets to vote on a different-sex marriage, but that doesn't mean your divorce is safe.