NEWS FLASH: It's Not 'All About The Bride'

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There are not a lot of things that can get me more fired up, more quickly, than a well-meaning wedding guest or supplier explaining a bride's entitled behaviour with a shake of the head:

"Oh, well! It is the bride's day!"

I know some people love the sound of their own voice (I'm a celebrant, after all..) and others are just repeating what they think they should say, but let's get real here.

It's 2017 (for Buddha's sake..) and last time I checked, most adult females in the western-world were marrying for love (or at least, a healthy inheritance) and were permitted to decide who they were going to spend the rest of their lives with.

So why are we still:

1) Telling women that the wedding is all about them?

2) Ignoring the fact that it takes two (or more!) people to get married in the first place?


3) Indulging and/or humouring self-centered, irrational and sometimes damaging behaviour?

Let's be completely clear: a wedding is not 'all about the bride'.

In fact, less than 50% of the wedding should be about the bride.

You know that amazing guy (or girl) that is the other half of the couple getting married? Yeah, they deserve a chance to contribute too.

And unless a couple are running off to elope, have lost all connection to their heritage or arrived here in a space-egg-cocoon-thingy, their families would most probably appreciate being a part of the wedding as well.

Times and expectations have changed (and will continue to evolve) and while there are many different degrees and definitions of equality in every relationship and culture, in Australia in 2017, a wedding is rarely the only opportunity for a woman to express themselves and be seen, noticed or appreciated.

So let's be the next generation of progressive change-makers who acknowledge that, while everyone's experiences of weddings are different, beginning a marriage by recognising it takes two to tango, is beginning as you mean to go on.